Once it start, its really hard to stop it. Sometimes you can't sleep. If you do, you wake up continuously feeling like shit. You try to study, work, attend classes...but the emotions follow you like shadow, its hard to dismiss it. You try to talk to close friends, helps to throw something out from the chest...but maybe not all...At this point, you may already know the source of pain, but you can't exactly blame others for feeling this...everybody has different perspective...what's so obvious for you to feel emotional might be very ridiculous for others...maybe its a gender thing..maybe its a personality thing...maybe....all you need is to find ways to channel those burning emotions out.
I walked into the art studio..the nude lady stood still in the middle of the studio..waiting for me to draw her...big sheets of paper were laid on the floor...charcoal are tied up on a long stick...I picked the stick up...breathing hard...the emotions flow down the veins of my hand...I start drawing...fast bold strokes, heavy, black strokes. I underlined her curve, her shades of pink on her breast, her thigh, her skin.
I did not erase a single stroke...I continue to release my emotions to the paper. My professor walked over. Looked. said," she seems to be moving around when she is actually standing still". Guess that describes my lines, my strokes...its not very settle...its in all directions...I successfully put my emotions on my drawing..
and later my drums...my dancing..
That might really explains why artists are weird and hard to understand.. The have mood swings..and they actually need mood swings to channel their skills into good use...Some say its creativity...I say its expression....
Sorry to those who find me hard to get, hard to understand...I guess art can rescue me from you....
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