Chemistry sparks

It’s not an easy task to bond with others. Now, I could think of four.

First, you can do it by Nationality.

Secondly, bond by Ethnic.

Thirdly, through the language you speak.

Forth, Religion.

As a Chinese, English, Malay, and some other dialects not good enough to be mentioned, or having attended an English speaking International College, I tend to be proud of my ability to differentiate people from different countries and places. For instance English, I could quite easily identify the different accent from different countries and places that I have been.

As a Chinese speaker, I hate to be called a Chinese from Mainland China. I called myself Malaysian Chinese. We are Chinese, but we are different. With a linguist tongue, tough fighter for the survival of culture and language in a ‘foreign’ land, I somehow want to justify that Malaysian Chinese are ‘better’ than the others from around the world thus we are a unique group. Funny that I enjoy being mistaken as Japanese or Koreans, people with the same slit eyes but different ethnics.

However, being called a Malaysian, I am not particularly proud of my own country’s political situation either. I feel reluctant to represent my country sometimes, telling others the ‘harmonious’ society of multiracial and colors are only as a result of separate ruling methods and settlements. For generations we have been talking about the opportunities not given evenly to different ethnics, and yet until today, the problems have not been solved, and the people are still continuing to mumble in the dark, fearing to define the reality of the freedom of speech in the country. I condemn the political decision that has made the society ‘color’ conscious more than ever (even we tend to explain we are only joking).

Then in a foreign land, where you are known as the ‘Farang’ ( foreigner in Thai),where you are supposed to be lost and confused, I feel free like a bird. I am suddenly given the benefits of both foreigners and locals. Simple, I speak fluent English which I can share information 'secretly' with the farangs, enjoy the rights of being an outsider oversee and comment different situations critically, not abide (or often forgiven) by the culture and rules of what is ‘appropriate’ or not to do or say.

On the other hand, due to my ethnic (or looks), religion and interest in Thai, I am easily being accepted locally. I can blend into the crowd easily, I can enjoy local price, I know about the inside stories within any groups without much pressure to choose a specific social group to hang out with. I stroll from groups to groups, forming the map of relations in my head, improving my Thai.

Moreover, in a foreign land, I am bonded with my own ethnic faster and easier due to the knowledge of our roots and language. Suddenly, the ‘other’ Chinese that are different before are my friends now. From our common superstar idols to little family talks, we have nothing to hide. The different accent and dialects are tolerable now. We started to prioritize these friends over the others, thinking that they can understand us better.

And so I tried, my sister and I went out with our new Taiwanese friend to a Chinese Temple, another place which I never thought that I would meet so many Chinese from different Nationalities in Bangkok. Our common topic? Cynical enough, it was about how the locals ‘bullied’ the Chinese wherever we go. Well it is understood that these Chinese are from the older generations who had experienced the changes before and after war. They had seen Government closing down the Chinese stall and tearing the Chinese business plate apart, for the sake of equality economically; taking away our common Mother tongue, (which I think they are still gradually trying to make it happen in Malaysia), by changing names and closing schools…We have come this far, and yet, we are still striving, sharing our story of success, from our new homelands.

A trip to the temple made me understand it is always up to me to decide what links me to the others. There are many different dots to link, we, the citizens of the world, are so different, yet so similar in many ways.

Would I try to ignite a spark if I am home in my comfort zone?