Being Atypical

my first attempt on writing a review

2011-07-14T10:00:00.003-04:00

So I m working in the Marketing section of the arts center and I wrote this amateur review for the Merce cunningham show:

This was my first Merce Cunningham show, and wow it blew me away. With Cunningham’s renowned impact on avant-garde, I was almost expecting walking out with question marks. To me, the term avant-garde has always sound intimidating, sophisticated yet abstract, and it would sure be difficult for me to ‘get it’. But to my surprise, I walked out nodding and smiling by how much I can relate to the dancers who portrayed Cunningham’s vision.

Cunningham has broken down the modern contemporary steps into an easier and relatable language of life. An act where every dancer inserted a bouncy ring inside their leotards reminds me of my interaction with the ‘outside’ world -- the uncomfortable first impressions and insecurities that I have to carry inside us despite that flawless confident smile. The bouncy ring in every dancer seems to represent that insecure feeling: awkward and uncomfortable yet we have to pretend that it is never there.
The dancers from the Merce Cunningham Dance Company looked like they have taken part-time acting classes. In “Squaregame”, big fluffy tutu-looking dresses weighed heavily on the female dancers as they circled around a male dancer in the middle, who was sorting out his four-sleeves-sweater. I was amazed how a dance performance can become a witty comical show. Not only were the dancers’ demanding dance moves in sync with the playful music, together with the dancers’ expression they delivered perfect comic timing.

The “Antic Meet”, music by John Cage was my favorite piece. When two female dancers tip toed their perfect lines onto the stage, their elegance was turned completely upside down with the ‘cat fights’ they were having with each other. Each of them either purposefully blocks the other’s way or makes funny face behind the other’s back. The audience and I broke into laughter. The unexpected scene made the extreme talented and skillful artists human, because they have related their act to our everyday life and challenges. No matter what we do, there will always be somebody looking at us, thinking that we are complete idiots; therefore no act would be perfect without some healthy backstage drama! Isn’t that why people watch reality shows these days? The act continued with two men marched in circles and greeted each other with their poker face and straight defensive posture. This time, gender seems to determine how the dancers interact with each other. The culture of machismo was shown here when the two men refuse to show their emotion, possibly weaknesses to each other. The dancers have skillfully interpreted the different human behaviors and left space for some thoughtful reflection.

Though all three pieces in the show were first performed more than thirty years ago, Cunningham’s works transcend time and spaces. The extravagance of Andy Warhol’s décor combined with sharp retro color (the bright purple leotard, anyone?) still works like magic visually. Even with my little expertise in the modern contemporary dance, I could tell that Cunningham’s works will continue to impact and influence today’s younger dancers and audience.

Fear

2011-06-26T18:25:00.002-04:00

I remember the time when I was still an active blogger, can't wait to tell the world how I feel and what I have learn.

Recently, it has all stopped. I fear people bridging my privacy, knowing too much, I fear I have invaded others' privacy for mentioning them or giving TMI about them. In the world of social media where you could just add an '@'sign in front of a person's name to make sure they are notified when you talk about them, I slowly fail to see the very purpose of mentioning.

Are the attention-seeking real? Do I really want to know what people think about me? from a mere picture, one-sentence statement, what I wrote about my life? Fear of judgment has become my biggest hurdle to write, to express myself like I used to be. My experience of living in between cultures have exposed me to the many interpretations of actions and behaviors in life. A free-spirit girl in America can be interpreted as a slut in Morocco; a submissive woman in Malaysia can be seen as lack of woman's right from the west. News reporting became a bias information feeder to the ignorant readers who blindly trust but do not question deeper.

Who are my readers anyway? Are they just family and friends? I refuse to put my blog on private because I believe that my thoughts are interesting and meaningful enough to educate a stranger. My pride told me that I can unconsciously impact a conscious reader. Discussing about my life could eventually inspire others' journey of seeking self, education and purpose in life. However, recently, I think I am muted. I have muted myself.

Oh I have lived. I have lived through the wonderful extreme ends of Moroccan culture, breathed in the dry desert wind and lush spring flowers of the country, crossing lines of black and white to understand reality of human suffering and wandering, peaked through the lives of both elites and struggling hard workers from the deep narrow streets of the old cities, and invaded the exclusive religious but unorthodox ceremonies in the dark. Can I tell? Can I really tell what I have seen, heard and smelled?

Can my stories recuperate my adventurous desire that fails to surface in this purposeful arranged routines in the summer by this prestigious and expensive institution that I pay a peanut (compared to many) to get in?

But I think I have already made my decision. My brain could not hold anymore. It wants to be freed, freed of secrets, freed from hiding. I have a lot to say, and somehow, neither my term paper, nor my facebook and twitter status are enough to contain that. Whether its my superficial self seeking for attention, or my civic self wanting to teach others about my free-spirited life, I think it is time again for me to speak up.

Stay tuned.

Eliana's blog

2011-05-22T09:10:00.001-04:00

I tried to write, but never did, so here it is , my experience in Morocco from a 3rd person's perspective:P

http://regardshome.blogspot.com/

open ended possibilities

2011-03-15T16:21:00.002-04:00

what are they?

I wanna do a senior project that consists of research and drumming in Cuba, stage production and documentary.

Where do I need to plan that performance, when do I want to go, what application do I need to fill , advisors, recommendation letter. What come first?

Takes months to get all the material ready. You want to realize a dream? do the job of planning and logistics.
Yeap, that's what I have been doing besides class. on top of that, I still need to find art related internship in the summer, after I come back from Morocco foreign study abroad program.

Luckily I got to talk to people who are so supportive regardless of my amateur approach to this project. From recommendation to execution to budget handling, I wish I can synthesis all my resources as soon as possible before I leave.
All rantings do not get my job done. so I have to do more writing. please hope for the best!

flights...

2010-12-07T16:55:00.002-05:00

I have a friend who's in the soccer team , they travel almost weekly in plane to compete with other universities.
Free plane rides...whoa...

one of the benefit of having a 'good' job is also the free business trips you can get from your company.....

but after my more then 28 hours straight flights, I am not so sure I am up for plane trips anymore. Sleeping in the plane can kill time, but it makes me more tired.
With luck, you might get two seats for yourself because nobody's next to you. But if not....its just pure cramming.

Ahhhhh...two more hours till the FINAL touch down.

Welcome home, myself.

Deaths

2010-12-01T17:29:00.004-05:00

I have no time to document my encounter with deaths. Some deaths feel "nearer" to me than others.

A couple of weeks ago, a prof from Art History dept died of breast cancer. She was 40. I saw her death has impacted many people near me: My current art prof burst out in tears infront of her students in class; my research prof ( who's probably around the same age with her) couldn't really focus on work even though she doesn't know her;I might have taken her class at some point, people said she's brilliant, but most of all, I just found out that she's the wife of my art grant advisor. He has never mentioned it to me, the whole time we were speaking, god must know how hard he has been through everyday.

A primary school teacher just died yesterday. She taught me public speaking. She's always approachable during my visits after graduation. She's my sis's classmate's mom. She's my teachers' colleagues. I talked to her a lot when I was 12 years old in school.

Miraculously, I dreamt of my dear friend who died a couple of years ago of cancer. He was still so warm and friendly in my dream.

RIP.

Mounting pressure from all directions

2010-12-01T13:26:00.002-05:00

Like nobody's business..
Have just been hiding trying to keep my pressure cooker from exploding
All subjects have paper due sometime sunday or later but I would not be able to do it on the plane so basically I have to finish it prior.
Am anticipating a reverse culture shock when I go home: language , conversation , culture, food , means of entertainment
Super excited but super worried
Bought tons of valuables and am worried of custom , luggage
Have been rambling about all these to ppl...so I hope ppl don't feel I am too much!
Now back to my papers!

concert tomorrow

2010-11-10T22:35:00.003-05:00

The few interesting events that occurred today:

I learned to spell Burkina Faso's capital, i.e. Ouagadougou ( no I lied, I still use the spell check), but yeah, you can never finish learning the capitals of every country in the world. My prof who have been there for her thesis research never stop talking about her experience there. For her, I guess Burkina Faso is Africa.

Came across a friend that I don't usually bump into. He told me he got hired to a very competitive consulting company and is willing to share a tips or two in getting to interviews, getting the job etc. I was happy to hear that he is so low profile and generous to help; you hear a lot about these people getting high prestigious consulting job, but they are usually cocky and not really willing to share their experience. I bet even now, not many know that this friend got into this top ranked consulting company and gets to choose which country he wants to be! Is this a bonus to me ? or should I still stick to looking for my own passion?

I HAVE to talk about SEX infront of my residents next week,yeah part of my job description as an undergrad advisor. So I went to seek advice on how to conduct this potential awkward and chaotic meeting. There comes a time where you really need to confront your inner fear of talking about certain 'sensitive' or personal topic.

Had a long rehearsal from 6- 9 30pm today for my percussion ensemble. I was lost most of the time , cause even I know the beats, I still need to coordinate the beats with the guest performers, which is a 7- people-Cuban band. Using my rusty Spanish, I was able to ask for help, and their music guru, W, was such a nice guy. I have to be frank, I have a musician crush on him. On the other hand, the other band members might have a crush on me too. They came to me and ask for a photo together, and didn't ask the others. good guess? lol.

My voice is still lost, due to me drinking everything but water. But I find my voice kinda sexy, not everyone thinks so though.

ok. adios!

Boston

2010-11-08T00:04:00.004-05:00

I was always kinda "forced" to take up some drumming gigs because I belong to the world music percussion ensemble. I call it "forced" because usually these invitation to perform come in really late and without any early notice. Most of the time, I have to readjust my schedule or sacrifice something in order to make those performance happen. Of course, I enjoy every opportunity I have to perform, but when it finally comes to " how can I spend my time for me? " question, I don't think I know how to answer that really well.

So this week, I decided to go with the flow, and just join Kevin and his friends to Boston, and not make it to a concert. We got a free ride ( well in a car, not the $ 50 per person bus ride) to Boston and have a free place to stay ( one of our friends got an interview with a consulting firm, and they gave him a nice big room in a hotel with room service and parking space, food, etc just for the interview) . See if you want to have a good luxury life, see how the companies trying to lure you into the corporate world. It really comes down to the lifestyle you wanna live . $ 300 dollars hotel room for an interview ?? maybe!

I called up Jonathan and Olivia before the trip. Luckily they can both make time to meet up with me. We went around the Boston to search for place eat, and later go out. Me and Olivia got some girl time in a bar , catching up where we left off almost 2 years ago. It feels so nice to have somebody who understand you, and just spill everything without any burden. Sadly, I lost my voice from the day before and it wasn't really pleasant to hear my voice for the two days.

Massachusetts is a really strict state. They are not allow to serve alcohol after 12 30 am and and they don't have trains after 12 30 am. After that its really up to us how we go home. All the taxis were just trying to hike up the price coz this is not New York. High demand, low supply , we have mean taxi drivers. We walked half the city just to catch a bus to go to Olivia's college, Wellesley. Luckily we made it to the bus stop just in time.

So in short, got some real food, real city life, real conversation, real friends, and real time for me!

random observation

2010-11-05T10:57:00.003-04:00

I decided that instead of not saying anything about my life in detail
i could spat out stuff that I have yet thought through, most of my time in Dartmouth, I am just rushing from place to place, and haven't have enough time to reflect on things :

Art history department dinner- realized that the department which is located next to the Baker library is used to be the Museum ( studio art department used to be there after the museum is moved , then occupied by art history department)

The everchanging of Dartmouth is witnessed by most staff and faculty more than student
Talked to a Safety and Security officer who has been here since 1982. According to her, she knows the nasty details of the parents ( who are Dartmouth alums) of current students!
As people know, the legacy is really strong here, most dartmouth alum want to send their children back to Dartmouth

CEO of Ebay (who is a dartmouth alum) gave a talk:
his son is a 2009 Graduate of Dartmouth too, he married his wife who is one year older than him in Dartmouth, and ever since then coordinated with his wife for 25 years of how both their careers could fit with each other to start family, advance in corporate ladder etc. All networking starts with curiosity and authenticity of character

The first women editor of the Dartmouth newspaper is now the chief editor of International Herald Tribune , she came back to talk about international journalism, says that her main motivation to go after her career is the lifestyle that she wants ( being abroad) , rather than merely journalism ( cause its very low pay)

Network yourself into a job!!! that's what everybody advices, have curiosity with people !!

My Egg Obsession

2010-07-26T16:34:00.002-04:00

I am an addict! An Egg addict! I need a cure!!

I eat egg tarts everyday even though I know the crust of the egg tarts I bought from this particular shop is too flaky. I would order chicken burgers and take eggies from Kevin's plate as additional level.

Eggies I consume:

Egg tarts- one a day

Scramble eggs - one every two days

French Toast -- once a week

Fried Eggs -- if i m not eating any of the above

I thought I just hear my mom's warning of high cholesterol and potential of stroke ..haha

Am I the fish in this tank?

2010-07-22T19:23:00.007-04:00

People have told me many times that our Major doesn't necessarily have to do with what we are going to be doing in the future. However,whenever you are asked" what do you study in college? " people wants to, in their head, do the equation and to link your answer to your prospective career.

"Geography" I said. " Oh you like maps? "

"Geography and Studio Arts" as if trying to justify myself " Oh, you like drawing maps?"

"Geography, but I like the human geography part, you know the development and cultural issues? " I thought linking myself to social goals is always a good answer. " Wow, didn't know geography covers that, so what will you be doing then? " So they still can't do the math, cause there is no job that people can immediately relate to a Geography major. In superficial settings, when people initially trying to get to know you, that's dangerous. Cause you can be shoved aside and listed in their head as the " I-can't-relate-to-her" lady.

Yes, we live in the world where people try to simplify things all the time. Simplification allows them to use less to understand more and make judgment. All the ads, the marketing plans, all the business models are simplified so that people could "fall in love" to the products easily without asking too many questions. Thus all the powerpoint work for interns. haha.

What happen to career exploration? ask more questions? question everything?

That's precisely how I ended up in New York City. Testing what I know and what I don't. Testing the tank full of fish, and see whether I belong here.

Turns out I still have to go back to the internet to make future plans. Not that I do not like socializing and exploration. But the city can be mean if you do not know anyone. I can't possibly go anywhere without friends by myself, and its so hard to make plans with friends who do not seem to know how to follow up.

Ideally, I would like to look up random alums with big money and works with big company and just chat with them. But that requires a lot of research and asking the right questions. Better yet, keep a communication log and record all the conversation that has happened. Well, I really like to know how people achieve their career goals!But that takes so much time!

I had a rough start in NYC, maybe I was not careful enough,but it teaches me that unpaid internship can be really sketchy. When there's no pay involve, people could just use you as cheap labors. That's how I feel the only few days at my first internship. They made me make a bunch of phone calls to random restaurants to ask for random donations. Who does that? Why would people help a random stranger ? That is in fact, the key to my discovery in New York.

"Who would help a random stranger?" The answer is of course: NOBODY.How do we solve that problem? By NETWORKING. Over the month, I understand that the core difference between Bribery and Networking. Both involves knowing the right people, but the former requires you to give lots and lots of "present" to make them happy to return any favor, while the later requires a good sense of humor, the right personality to keep those "helpful" people in your loop without letting them know you are actually "networking". It is a paradox, because when networking seems more noble, bribery is more honest, because the objective is clear at the very beginning.

I networked to find my second internship. Yes, I quit, and I was panicked for about two weeks. But thank Buddha that I wasn't alone. I have the best bf and a groups of close friends from Dartmouth. I talked to alums, talked to my mentor, talked to friends and many many more people. Doug, my percussion teacher, was kind enough to point me to a great direction, his best friend, Tim, who is the deputy director for an Arts Management Company. I went straight to their office and got the position the next day I returned from exile in Dartmouth.

Being an intern in this company makes me think even more. Arts industry is a tough world without good business management. This company,working as non-profit, strives to provide different services for the arts community such as software design, insurance, space rentals, fund-raising and more. Most colleagues in the company are smart people with interest in arts and usually have a graduate degree. ( Q1: is master degree a must?) Working in a non-profit sector doesn't mean you don't earn money, is just that you are not entitled to own shares, and become a millionaire over-night because you do well. A common misconception is that a non-profit consists of poor management who always ask for donations to keep a company running. But this company's business model is to get funding to develop new projects so that when the project is successful, they can generate their own revenue and run continuously without more funding.

There are so many questions that I wanted to ask all these smart people around me, but sadly, I am not a vampire. Nobody likes to be asked " what's your life challenge and key to success " everyday. My dear friend Faaez from Pakistan shared with me, " Americans separate their time for serious conversation and non-serious ones, don't ever bring up world poverty during lunch, expect people to discuss with you, they will think that you are an idiot". So guys' lunch conversations are " chick talk, trash talk, and ball talk, lebron james will be a good topic too". Girls, " boyfriends, sex, boys, flirting, sex, boys, sex boys". Welcome to America. (Q2: Then when is the best time to network?).

Day 1-- I absolutely enjoy most of the conversations with my colleagues, cause we talked about majors , studies, and work application.

Day 2-- the whole office was all excited about " the guy in the rainbow" high on drugs You tube clip. ( if you want to know the extend of the interest of this topic which I fail to relate to , watch it, also check out the number of clicks it receives.)

Day 3-- I am swamped with work and I feared I cannot finish my assignments in time. I was to research and compare any software in the internet and market that provides good features for small scale arts organization and arts school. Though having no time to talk to my new acquaintance, I did managed to learn a hell lot about writing a consultation report. Seeing my colleagues have all the time to chat with one another and making jokes, I understand a beginner like me will take more time to finish a task than them, so I do not have the luxury to talk.

Off days (like today)-- I would continue to work for my professor, who is hiring me, despite my lack of attention to the work I was paid to do in the Spring. But since I live in the city and have to get paid, I might as well be a good assistant. Again, the countless " geography major" conversation stuck in my head, and I had to do something about it. One of the summer tasks is to continue to find courses that interest me and keep me pursuing my million interests ( such as Marketing, Art History, Women and Gender Studies) on top of the Geography Major requirements and Modification with Studio Arts course. Moreover, I was suppose to volunteer ( I clearly haven't learn my lesson about unpaid internship) for a Jazz promotional non-profit started by non other than Jude Law ( will never meet him). I had the chance to learn about the principles of PR job , I was suppose to find writers and press who could help the organization promote their latest "gig tool" online. I am even invited to their salon event, which entails cocktail dress, drinks, and jazz musicians!

But I am about to call everything off to go to Motema's b'day in Dartmouth. Reasons?
Yes I could be networking with tonnes of new contacts, but ultimately , I will only receive enough name cards for god knows when to use. A pure superficial event, fun to go if I am with a bunch of girl friends.But I do not even know the organizers ( only thing I know is that they date within the organization, or , they volunteer together), and have only met with my supervisor once.

Based on my experience in Bangkok, it takes more than a month to let people feel comfortable to be around you, to accept you as a friend, and willing to tell you the 'truth' about their world, their lifestyle. That's why I am very much an intruder ( I know that because everybody has each others' skype account in the office and chat except me, everybody could track each other's calendar except for me, I am pretty much out of their intercom network). Which leads to another crucial question ( Q3: How much can you know about a culture and place in 4 weeks? if so, do I really need to go to another study abroad which I am accepted, or should I just focus on career/soul searching for my remaining terms in Dartmouth? )

There are still so much to think about. My life as an intern is not done yet. But I hope I will learn along the way and would one day declare what I really wanna do in the future.

What I did on Monday 8 am to 10 pm (click for photos)

2010-06-22T22:04:00.004-04:00

We literally move 6 boats from main road to the lake, built 3 platforms on 6 boats, move all the instruments onto the platform, moved other instruments to three other spots facing the lake, Assisted the performance by playing the thunder sheets, took the boats to the shore, took of the platform, load the boats to the truck and load all the instruments back. Unforgettable group effort and spirits to make music happen.

Check out this video of the performance from 4 45pm to 6 15 pm. ( less than 2 hours is the actual performance!!) and New York Times' review...look out for me among the bushes when u click on 'slideshow' lol....

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/23/arts/music/23xenakis.html

persephassa on the lake from liubo on Vimeo.

Liquid....

2010-06-01T03:03:00.002-04:00

literally flowed out from my eyes, ears, nose in various color.

I am not trying to disgust you, but its true, I don' t know what is wrong with me.

I am experiencing so-throat, bleeding both my nose and ear, and red eyes.

I guess its the stress-- well, I don't really stress about work.

I guess I don't drink enough water-- maybe, because there isn't enough warm water and I don't feel like drinking cold water all the time.

Well that's my physical condition.

Not too serious to be worrying yet.

Then again, do I really wanna tell you what's in my head, in my heart?

A term's ending is another beginning. There are so many unknown in front of me. I couldn't think beyond June. All I know is , I am going to be in New York, with a friend who's willing to host me, with a job, which I am yet to know what is it about.

I wanted to explore my artistic instinct, whether I am fit for the artsy world, whether I am choosing the right thing on campus, whether I am spending my time wisely. Whether I am learning, and making myself happy and useful everyday.

At the same time, I will be missing a good company. Someone whom I have spent most of my Dartmouth with. I don't want to think about it yet, but its coming. Oh life, why can't it be any easier?

Green Key Weekend

2010-05-16T18:46:00.002-04:00

This is a weekend where its perfectly fine to drink the night away and party as hard as you want!
For me, I have been working the whole term for this week, and finally I got to perform in this big event of the year-- Step show ( see video in previous post) !

Memorable moments this weekend:

-When Motema, Sabrina and I coincidentally wore Purple and laugh to a scene under a tree!

-When the dance floor was cleared up and Kevin, the DJ cum BF played specially picked songs for only Motema, Sabrina and Me!

-When the boys and I spent an hour in FOCO and then building 'Eifel' Towers in the room. lol

-When people do not know whether I am hyper or typsy .

- Frat hopping.

Now that the week has ended, I have to study for finals on Monday!

Ujima show last saturday!

2010-05-16T18:44:00.001-04:00

Another blog

2010-05-05T22:43:00.002-04:00

Hi Readers,

I am keeping another blog for my writing class this term. The posts are more intellectual motivated and less personal, however, its another way of learning what I am doing on campus and what I am learning!

Enjoy.

Si Jie

Have I lose....(click)

2010-03-29T00:24:00.003-04:00

my habit of blogging?

Time never seems to be enough for me when classes are on.

But when I have them, over the spring break (the past 2 weeks) essentially,instead of blogging, here's what I did:

1) Overslept till 2 pm due to watching late night movies from iTunes rental store
2) Spent the first few hours upon waking up cooking, shopping for food, and eating
3) Watched more movies
4) Repeated step (2) for dinner, sometimes cooking for a big group of friends

5) Okok I did meaningful stuff too: phone interviews for summer internship (positive:P)
6) Organized late night hang out, dancing the night away with African music
7) Drove 2 hours to Boston to shop for shoes, belts, bags, jackets, and Chinatown food supplies
8) When not shopping in Boston, ate African food in Ethiopian restaurant and Chinese dim sum the next morning
9) Moved into a new dorm where I am hired to be a UGA
10) (since am on the R boat)Talked about future plans involving big words such as "coordination" and "commitment" which is yet to be determined of course

So enough of reflection, what's popping for Spring term (starting tomorrow)?

1) Newly hired as a UGA, basically am assigned to take care of a floor of residents
2) Applying for grants to work in New York for the summer
3) To help envision better network/organization for international students
4) Perfect my dance moves for Ujima ( a dance group i just joined)
5) Continuing to get paid working different jobs on campus
6) Taking exciting classes such as Painting, Writing with Media, and my first LAB CLASS with my bf as the TA (lol, very tricky:P)
7) Embracing Raggae, Bob Marley for the upcoming WMPE concert
8) More future planning...
9) Keeping up with friends...

Ah..the list can go on...But if you don't see me blogging anymore...refer to the list and you'll know why...

Friendship- pause. stop.

2010-02-28T23:26:00.002-05:00

Has it ever occur to you that friendships, as emotional attached can one be to them, has pauses and stops? I define friendship as a constant interaction between two people, where potentially through increase interaction, have increase importance in each other life.

Its very obvious in where I live, where the D plan makes it totally possible for you to be in touch or out of touch with someone for a long time. You could be 'best' friends and keeping track with everything each other do by simply being in the same class, doing the same activities. But once the term ends, and you take different courses, you can hardly even find time to catch up when you bump into each other on the streets. Occasionally you might suggest a lunch/ or dinner. But when that happens, you have maybe 8 weeks of gap of stories to tell. Eventually, you don't even bother update each other about your life anymore.

Perhaps I should thank the frats and sororities for holding all the dance parties: it happens almost every weekend, and presumably you go every weekend, you are bound to catch up with people at least once a week. What if you don't drink as much and find the basement sketchy and stinky?

Thinking out of the Dartmouth landscape, I now have friends across the globe where I proudly claim to be good friends with. With the little chance of traveling, the time we could possible meet with each other is when I happened to be in a nearby city our country- I could fly over to visit the place , and also this friend, kill two birds with one stone. Then I find myself over the stretch of few nights, listening to stories stretching as far and 3 to 4 years back. When we finish our stories, we realized, our friendship has paused 3 to 4 years ago, and resumed for that few days. We love and appreciate each others' company but know that we will resume to the 'other' life fairly quickly as we part.

Maybe what I said is not fair to the friends who are now continents and oceans apart, where it's almost impossible to keep in touch frequently. But doesn't it make you think that,being in the same place, same city, same campus, there should be more motivation for us to keep up with friends, and depend less on coincidence?

I never stop wonder what stops us from sending that one blitz/email across for a get together or a lunch date?

Chinese New Year and Valentines:P

2010-02-25T19:42:00.003-05:00

Oh forgot to put some pictures from the two BIGGEST occasion in February:P

Africa Meets Asia!!(click for more videos!)

2010-02-24T11:58:00.003-05:00

Hi, so I am uploading all the songs we played on last friday's concert! It was a huge success. Sorry for the bad audio quality, this is what happened when you can't make it to the live concert!

Please search for the rest of the video clips on youtube using keywords " Africa Meets Asia" , More to come!!!

When is it okay to be emotional???

2010-02-11T18:54:00.005-05:00

When you are a person who get affected by others so easily, you tend to be very emotional. The force of emotions that starts from deep inside the heart find its way to your angry voice, frown face, shaky hands, and maybe unstable waves of feelings that linger in the head....

Once it start, its really hard to stop it. Sometimes you can't sleep. If you do, you wake up continuously feeling like shit. You try to study, work, attend classes...but the emotions follow you like shadow, its hard to dismiss it. You try to talk to close friends, helps to throw something out from the chest...but maybe not all...At this point, you may already know the source of pain, but you can't exactly blame others for feeling this...everybody has different perspective...what's so obvious for you to feel emotional might be very ridiculous for others...maybe its a gender thing..maybe its a personality thing...maybe....all you need is to find ways to channel those burning emotions out.

I walked into the art studio..the nude lady stood still in the middle of the studio..waiting for me to draw her...big sheets of paper were laid on the floor...charcoal are tied up on a long stick...I picked the stick up...breathing hard...the emotions flow down the veins of my hand...I start drawing...fast bold strokes, heavy, black strokes. I underlined her curve, her shades of pink on her breast, her thigh, her skin.

I did not erase a single stroke...I continue to release my emotions to the paper. My professor walked over. Looked. said," she seems to be moving around when she is actually standing still". Guess that describes my lines, my strokes...its not very settle...its in all directions...I successfully put my emotions on my drawing..

and later my drums...my dancing..
That might really explains why artists are weird and hard to understand.. The have mood swings..and they actually need mood swings to channel their skills into good use...Some say its creativity...I say its expression....

Sorry to those who find me hard to get, hard to understand...I guess art can rescue me from you....

I drew with my left hand!!!

2010-02-09T16:09:00.002-05:00

Its so cool and liberating...
and its my first time having a nude model in front of me.
its not as exotic as I thought...when you are constantly trying to finish the figure drawing within 5 minutes...we need 9 drawings of different poses in a horizontal paper..

Dartmouth is suffering from 100 Million dollars budget cuts. Though the scale is smaller but almost identical with the financial crisis that just experienced in US....
students two years from now might have more loan than we do....

Successful Winter Ball!!

2010-02-08T02:00:00.004-05:00

I am writing to tell you about.......

2010-01-24T17:43:00.002-05:00

Dear Family and Friends,

If you think I am ignoring you these days....that's probably TRUE!!

For the first time, I am taking up leadership roles in the College, Organizing big concerts and events for the Dartmouth Community!

Besides the on going process to figuring out my major and future profession, I am also:

1) Organizing an upcoming Winter Ball for the ISA(International Students' Association)
-- Just got elected for this term's Vice President- Social, so that's basically my job scope. On top of that, we wish to implement our collected Dartmouth effort to help Haiti in their post Earthquake trauma. Therefore, I have lots of email flying all over the place.

2) World Percussion Music Ensemble Concert
-- I am bringing lots of songs that I have been played in my high school Oriental Music Orchestra and try to implement it to this year's concert. Hopefully we could do some Asia/Africa Remix!!! Some of the songs selection includes the forever famous " Matsuri" by Kitaro and " Mukala-Mukala" by A R Rahman!
-- Since I am unable to read music notes, I have to literally translate the Numbering system from the Chinese Music Notes to Christina, who will write it into the western music notes for the rest of the Members...then have to find alternative instruments to replace the Chinese intruments....Ahhh......Why didn't I learn piano when I was younger/??

3) Tried to join Sorority but it didn't work out...But I think its for the best, considering so little time I have ..hahhaa

4) Of course all the class readings...this year am taking Human Geography, International Politics and Drawing 1

But I can't describe everything in details guys, I have to read for my Midterm Exam next week, and cook dinner!! Ciaoz....
But even if I have been ignoring you, I still love you!!:P

It's okay....

2010-01-13T16:16:00.002-05:00

We always start our drumming rehearsals by grading our day from 1-10. Usually I would be around 8,9 since I am generally a happy person. My music director, Hafiz, already doing what he's doing for more than 20 years...always comes in with a big smile and chuckles in between conversations.

While everybody is busy grading their day....I am still frustrated with the lost luggage...Hafiz suddenly said: "Just one and a half weeks ago, I realized, It's okay when something is not always right..I don't feel the need to stress on everything I do. I don't push it anymore. It's okay to slow down, sit back and see how things go"

He is having thoughts of retirement too. A master drummer like him, who has drum ever since he was 7, starts to look for other things in life to inspire him. He even started to learn Chinese QI GONG, hoping to bring his drumming skills further....

Back to the fast pace life in Dartmouth, when you run between places and only catch up with friends for 40 minutes during meal time, I am determined to instill this philosophy into my head: " It's okay, I still haven't find my luggage...It's okay, sometimes I couldn't finish my reading...It's okay, when people disappoints me,..It's okay when somebody says no to me...It's okay......"

My Boston Flight got canceled!

2010-01-02T19:18:00.001-05:00

My Boston Flight got canceled!
Thanks to the strict security measurement due to a fail terrorist attack last week, everything is chaotic in the airports, at least in the US. Everybody’s luggage and body have to be manually search by officers before boarding on the plane, hence all the delays and cancelling of flight. The flight from Barcelona to JFK was 25th in line before landing, and we were just circling the New York sky for almost 30 minutes just to wait for available lanes (Can you picture airplanes lining up in the sky?? Haha).

So after the customs, I have to collect my luggage and then drop them off again. Everything is so redundant, and I have to walk to the other end of the airport just to find out my flight was canceled. Heard it was due to snowstorm too.

Yeah, you can sense my rambling tone, because I am: I have 20 more minutes before boarding to the next Boston flight, and then I am bound to miss my last bus to Dartmouth. So I have to find buses from other companies after collecting my luggage. Which means I have to first get myself to the bus station before searching for a new bus schedule, which will most likely be at midnight. So all in all, I have travelled for more than 1000 miles starting at 8 am in Barcelona, 9 30 am check-in, delayed flight left 2 hours later than scheduled time at 12 30pm, arriving 9 hours later at JFK, 3 hours delayed +1.5 hrs to Boston , 2hrs waiting for next bus + 2.5 hours to final destination aka Dartmouth, which I still have no key to my new room. TOTAL TRAVEL TIME= 22 HOURS!!! (excluding last night’s 10 hours traveling from Nairobi to Barcelona)

No stories about my vacation until my hyper self returns!

CIAO ROMA!!(click)

2009-12-10T15:54:00.003-05:00

Last day of my flamenco class

2009-12-03T08:20:00.000-05:00

Last Excursions!!(click)

2009-11-28T18:15:00.004-05:00

Thanksgiving dinner!

love this pic!

favorite seafood of all times:P

Oh the richness of the soup!

2009-11-25T10:12:00.004-05:00

Love the way my host mom prepared the soup of the day...
She boils the onions, garlic, peppers, perhaps some mushrooms, perhaps some beans....and many other unidentifiable ingredients....then the most important part...she BLENDS everything together...and the creamy aromatic soup is served!
It comes in different colors and portions...sometimes with a little rice, sometimes with fine spaghetti, and most of the time...just soup with bread...

Second course, the salad, love the way she cuts the veges and decorates them into a colorful plate of salad. Her best plate of salad yet: cabbage with black olives, avocados, sweet papayas, tomatoes and finally sprinkle the olive oil and vinegar on top of it. I actually fell in love with vinegar here in Barcelona...hahaha..sounds funny in Chinese-- 喜欢吃醋了！ (likes to be jealous:P)

Last but not least the desert. My host mom said the last course must always be sweet.
she does not like it when i mix everything up , such as eating the deserts then going back to the salad or the meat. So you could either choose a type of fruit or Flan ( spanish sweet pudding) with ice-cream. Weirdest contrast to my typical way of eating fruits, instead of eating the fruit ripe and crunchy (pears, peach, apples), we eat it overripe and soft....the taste is extraordinary sweet~~!!
So I learned how to eat soft overripe pears, peaches and also apples which are heated in the oven after 2 minutes.. Try it and tell me how it tastes~!!!:P

Universitat de Barcelona( UB)

2009-11-12T17:58:00.004-05:00

Since Dartmouth Study Abroad Program has been so well run in the past few decades, few of us rarely have to worry about anything at all. The excursions are well planned, we have Dartmouth students studying together with us, which means we do not really have the need to go out to the 'wild'.

However, after attending the UB international Orientation, I realized I have been inside the Dartmouth bubble even though I'm studying in UB! It was a very formal ceremony, where we were seated in the Para-nymph Hall of UB oldest historical building, well decorated with big murals and glorious marks of history. The first speech is actually about the hall itself, where the speaker introduce the meaning of every painting, the latin words on the wall, and the names and portraits in the hall( including king Alfonso, and the first female doctorate). Its a formal invitation for the international student, announcing the identity and purpose of this long standing institution for more than 500 years. I felt like I was sitting in a Basilica Cathedral because the wooden benches are just like the ones I have seen in the Cathedral. The speaker spoke in a special balcony so everyone could see him, giving him some sort of authority and poise.

I am not surprise when they said that the majority of the students are from Europe and Italy have the most students here. I looked around and see all new faces, who probably are just starting to adjust their life in Barcelona, when mine is almost ending. If I were to be just another student attending this University, these international students would have been my friends, some even best friends, family. But because I am with Dartmouth, I do not need to reach out. Even if I want to, there's really few rooms to float around. Everything is arranged.

I left early,right before their group picture....somehow I do not feel like I supposed to be in that group photo....

Watching FC Barcelona in the "Nosebleed" section

2009-11-09T06:51:00.004-05:00

Yeah the sensation is wonderful....a stadium that can fit 110,000 people
Imagine one horn, one curse, one scream multiply by 110,000

Anyways, so me and Ana came up with all these funky rules when watching a Barca match:

1) Bring warmer cloths!!! especially if you are in a nose-bleed section (aka the highest level of the stadium where you can barely see the players:P )

2) embrace/ learn the cursing when the other team scores..

3) Sing along with the fans by reading the lyrics of the Barca song on screen "Barca,Barca, Baaaaaaarca"

4) Bring a Bocadillo (sandwich) to munch !

5) Apparently the top of the bottle can be a weapon (many throw them towards the field), so if you are bringing a bottle of water....avoid inspection or give the inspector your top (oops that doesn't sound right)

6) hide between the stairs during half-time to avoid the strong wind...

7) take pictures before the match ( cause then you can see the letters of "FC Barcelona" from the seats)

8) Shout your lungs out!!

Even though I was distracted by the cold and the crowd most of the time, and did not even recognize 'Henry' on the field, ( coz i dunno his number) I enjoyed this game very much!!!!

Back to Work....

2009-11-03T16:05:00.004-05:00

The aftermath of traveling and having awesome time with friends:

You realized how much money you have spent over the holidays and decide to stay home as much as possible....( maybe for a couple of days)

You realized how little you have practice the language you are supposed to master over the vacation and start panicking

The wave of homework and assignment starts coming in and you realize the term is ending soon!

You have to start worrying about Winter term: housing, winter itself and...the 'cityless' life...

You have to Skype everybody you know just to share the vacation that is now over!!

Madrid (click)

2009-11-01T19:46:00.001-05:00

Pictures from London!(click)

2009-11-01T18:51:00.001-05:00

Cooking European food in London....

2009-10-31T16:14:00.000-04:00

You always have to think about the first course, second course, and dessert..
then you do the shopping...then the cooking....
its fun.

and then a bottle of red wine:P

Living with Austeja and Maciej in London...I learn how to do it the European way:P

Virus virus Virus!!!

2009-10-26T12:44:00.002-04:00

So we, the LSA-ers are lucky enough to have a week plus of holiday, but so what??
Most of us are screwed with the aftermath of sickness:flu, cold, dirrhae ....

It started off well on last thursday, when we took the High velocity train (AVE) from Barcelona to Madrid. Took us only slightly more than 2.5 hours. The hotel we live in, Opera hotel was excellent, with good meals and strategic location at the center of Madrid. Still can´t believe that we are paid by Dartmouth just to visit the two important Museums in Madrid: Prado and Reina Sofia.

I think i fell in love with Valazquez, the pioneer artist in Spain whose master piece ¨the Meninas¨is Prado´s proudest asset. His modern idea of mixing reality and illusion, with different levels of space and light tells a story of his own, which still amazes today´s spectators.

On Saturday, we were ´released´to be on our own. Most of us chose to explore around Spain, near from Segovia and Toledo and far towards the south of Spain, the Andalusia state which important cities are Cordoba, Sevilla, Granada....

However, my travelling mate, Ana, started to show signs of uncomfort, our day started out slower as plan, and we headed to her hosts´apartment. Turns out she has high fever and suspected swine flu case.

Sunday, I decided to travel around Toledo, Spain´s old capital by myself. I forgot my camera, which was a pity. But lucky enough to have found travelmates upon arrival. There were a group of Thai stewards and stewardess and they are kind enough to help me take some photo.
Toledo is spectacular with the old castle, long river, cathedral and the theme color of badge that fill up the whole city. However, my nightmare also began here when we decided to order their local specialty: pork, veal, jamon....

The mixture of meat and the exotic way of preparing the dishes might have caused my stomach ache. I ended up have a dirrhae the very next day when I was supposed to travel south to Cordoba, the city where Mosque is built inside Cathedral... I am still contemplating whether I should take a midnight bus today to go to Cordoba and spend a day there before coming back to Madrid the very same evening...

Photos from Excursions(click)

2009-10-14T15:18:00.000-04:00

The rhetoric of Chinese women in relationship

2009-10-08T13:15:00.004-04:00

I have not been really updated with Chinese entertainment news, but the latest news I have heard is Andy Lau, the Hong Kong movie star/singer recently got married and has finally admitted his girlfriend of 24 years.

Growing up in Malaysia, we often hear rumours about his secret lover, since his girlfriend is Malaysian. I have always known that this day would come, but didn't really expect that he has been hiding this relationship for this long.

I bet you are wondering: why suddenly brought up a tabloid like this?

Due to my nature, I did some research on Youtube and found a Taiwanese program that specially discussed about Andy Lau and his 'concrete' girlfriend. He was accused a liar by fans for hiding the fact that he is 'engaged', but that wasn't the point. If you are dumb enough to ignore this rumor and blindly thinks that he is still single at 50, that's fine.

My point is, which type of women could bear such anonymity and sacrifice? To be invisible? To be unknown? to have no voice of your own? The program proudly analyzed the other Superstars like Jackie Chan. He too, has been hidding his wife and son for 20 years. His wife, Lin Feng Jiao, was a rising star in Taiwan when they first met. However, as soon as she got pregnant, she announced her exit from the entertainment industry and willing to be Jackie's invisible wife.

Many said that (chinese) women can bear and sacrifice anything, as long as the man 'loves' her, (by giving her a son/ daughter?) she does not need to be 'certified'. I am not surprised that critics found this positive. They actually admire such persistence from these women, who ask nothing in return. Instead, always do whatever the men wants. They always take care of his needs: never jealous because they understand the nature of their job as movie stars; never walk hand-in-hand in the public; worse, never say a word when questions are raised.

Perhaps these are extreme cases, we are talking about superstars here. But I find this kind of character in woman exists everywhere. I was taught that self sacrifice without any return is an honorable thing to do. My mom is such a woman, and I slowly realized myself too, is slowly falling into this rhetoric:

We are smart enough to let the guy 'win' in arguments (even though we know the truth is not necessary how he sees it);
we suffer with them ( even if we could easily solve the problem by ourselves) because we don't want to ruin their reputation;
we give them 'face' ( meaning not to ruin their public image, though the image might be a pretense);
we keep our fights and our problems to ourselves (never tell others besides close family member);
we give everything into the relationship: heart, soul, and 'self'. Being in the relationship seem to require us to lose our sense of self: we no longer pursue our own dreams ( especially dreams like movie star, singer, public figure that would outweigh the man), our own hobbies (cause our time is used to adjust around their life).Some might even give up their job and be a 24/7 mother.

What about women rights? What about feminism? What about our freedom to express and choose what we want? These ideas seem 'western' and only exist in 'democratic' country. But aren't we suppose to be progressive?

Lastly, just want to throw this into my argument: What is the cause of Domestic Violence?
Last week, I watched a movie " Te doy mis ojos" ( I give you my eyes) about domestic violence and I have to write a commentary on it:

The husband has been abusing his wife for years but still claims to love her. She left him to stay with her sister, and found her passion in being an Art Curator in Museums and decided to pursue her dreams. ( she found her 'self') But as she decided to go back home to his husband, her husband was challenged by the fact she dresses up for work, and not answers his phone calls. He thought she is cheating thus he lost his temper again and started to smash things in the house. At the end of the story, the wife was heading to her new job interview, when his husband stripped her off by force and humiliated her by locking her in the balcony of the house.
Just to be brief, she finally decided to leave him, even though he has not beaten her since.

I thought domestic violence are caused by man's insecurity of their 'self' rather than insecurity about the woman. He might have low self-esteem at work or his social life and therefore needs to release their sense of defeat at home by acting like a 'tyrant'. Housewives are usually the victims because they depend on their husband so much for living. Thus, bearing their temper seem to be the most natural thing to 'pay back' for what he has given to her, financially. But is this fair?

Going back to the Andy Lau and Jackie Chan's case-- Yes, I am happy for the women in their story. But are they the best example in showing the role of Chinese women in a relationship?

Having grow up in this culture and having exposed to romantic stories in novels and movie of this nature, I can't help the fact that I am clearly influenced by such rhetoric when I am in a relationship. I am 'weak' and 'self'less. But I am determined to be a more outspoken and independent woman, even though most of the time that does not really please the man.

Friends' collection of photos...

2009-10-06T07:14:00.002-04:00

Pictures from: Beach in Sitges, Liquor tasting , eatting juicy tree branch, Museum in Monserrat (old monastery by the mountain), and flamenco in Park Guel

Spanish culture observed and learned

2009-10-02T15:40:00.005-04:00

PIROPOS

meaning whistling or complimenting your physical appearance on the streets. Totally permissible in Spanish culture and its not an attack for the ladies. Ladies actually enjoy the ‘pilopos’ and usually smiles back (though didn’t stop walking). Might be a bit sketchy at night though.Wonder what the 8-10% of Muslims in Spain think about this.

MARIJUANA

Illegal to buy or sell, but legal to consume. Spanish respect everybody’s private life, therefore have no comment on what happen behind your own backyard. Basically you are allow to smoke pot at home, but people do it anyway in the Metro, on the street, before class, in the garden…. You name it. My conversation professor said that he once smelt pot from a student in his 8 30am class.

DRINKING

Alcohol beverages are cheap here for a reason. It doesn’t have a timeframe for a can of beer or a glass of wine. Some people drink at lunchtime before going back to work, which is a norm.

SMOKE

There’s no negative connotation to smoking here when 9 in 10 people smoke.

INTERRUPTING

The more the merrier! Spaniards interrupt all the time—according to my professor, they like to talk more than to listen, I hope he’s just joking. Hahaha. He once talked with a Chinese student, and he couldn’t stop talking because she wouldn’t interrupt! lol

PDA( Public Display Affection)

I couldn’t stress more how frequently they do it here. Touching and kissing is a way to express love, thus I see couples, from teenagers to old couple, they would hold hands, caress each other and of course kiss in public. Once, I was waiting on a Metro, when a couple sitting next to me making out loudly….The lady was sitting on the man’s lap, French kissing like nobody’s business. I was just 3 inches away from them….

SPANISH

Apparently, when you are absolutely certain that you will do something in the future, you use PRESENT tense instead of FUTURE tense. Therefore, when somebody is using FUTURE tense talking about the FUTURE, he/she has not make up their mind…hahaha

For example: He watches TV tomorrow (absolutely sure he’s gonna watch tv)

He will watch TV tomorrow ( he’s just saying, not sure yet)

HOW LIBERAL?

Homosexual marriage is legal for 5 years now and Abortion is legal since 1986!

Can’t think of more right now. Till next time. Dieu (Catalan way of saying ‘Adios’)

Barcelona-Merce Festival Recap Video

2009-09-29T03:57:00.000-04:00

Dartmouth Excursion trip in Barcelona (click)

2009-09-27T09:32:00.004-04:00

Touring the Medieval Places in Barcelona with Dartmouth students and professors....pampered with a four hour lunch.....fireworks, devils and dragons...and much more!

will post some videos soon!

Celebrating the Merce Festival in Barca (click)

2009-09-25T11:28:00.002-04:00

Detailed descriptions under each photo!:P

Barcelona sept 18-20

2009-09-22T02:47:00.003-04:00

First day in Barcelona

Arrived safely without much hustle. Bueno, maybe the luggage are too heavy, but what is there to lose with you have 2 free check-in luggage? These days, airlines do rip customer off by charging a whole lot of luggage fees.

Met a young woman, Denise in the plane who is a child psychologist. My mind was wandering, ‘grieving’ the fact that I have left Hanover, that I didn’t talk to her until 2 hours before landing. We were talking about children behavior problems and problems of peace in the world, and we reached a conclusion where peace is hard to achieved when one ( person/ country) over identifies him/herself. What might cause such action is fear of change, fear of losing power. Think about why locals hate immigrants? Why Globalization can be ‘polluting’ one’s culture and identity?

Upon finish admiring the interior of the Barcelona airport, I arrived at the baggage claim area and met my first classmate, Breanna. None of my classmates are friends with me in Dartmouth before this Language Study Abroad (LSA) trip, and I am the only non-American student. Amanda joined us half and hours later. Both of them have their mom helping them with packing. Reminds me of my first trip abroad with similar situations….four years ago.

After hours of waiting for more students arrived, we decided to give up and meet the rest of them in the city. It was an easy bus ride to Barcelona, a place that is going to be my home for 2 .5 months. We dragged our luggage all the way from the central station to the University Plaza, which is situated only a few blocks away. Doesn’t feel near when you have 2 big luggage and 2 carry on. Later, I stopped regretting bringing too many clothes because Barcelonans do dress up fashionably and I have to keep up with them! (so far, I think I did a good job:P)

8 of 12 students met and we started to stroll along the famous La Rambla street after we put down our luggage. We had 4 hours to spend before meeting our host family. From the street entertainers to different animal stalls, La Rambla in mid-September is full of energy. September is one of the best time to be in Barcelona and many tourists know not to miss the chill Mediterranean weather. I get the feeling that my group of classmates is trying to avoid doing touristy activities. Contrary to that, I love to just explore this particular street more than once just to observe the different people. I sensed danger (me dropping out from group activity).

At 5 pm, we finally met our host families. These families have been hosting Dartmouth students for years since the program first started. We are rest assured that we will be good hands ( its true!). Pepita, my host mom, greeted me with kisses on both my cheek. Ah, I am back to the ‘huggy & kissing’ culture that reminds me of my UWC friends. We were ‘warned’ not to be surprise about strangers standing in close distance, guys starring at girls when talking, closer ‘normal’ distance between people….yada yada yada (that’s why pickpockets use this culture to their advantages!)

I lived in a lovely apartment just slightly off the centre of the city. I could easily take a 20 minutes bus ride to classes daily. Public transport is the shit here! From the bus ride, I could see why Barcelona is one of the best city in the world. It accommodates EVERYBODY: The old, the young, the traditional, the modern, the locals and the foreigners. It is so easy to get around that old people do not need to depend on their son or daughter to meet up with their friends.

Extremely jetlagged and tired the first night, I did not unpack and slept without finding my toothpaste…..hahaa

Sept 19

Got our sim card first thing in the morning. For some reasons, Prof. Aguado, our trip leader was extremely panicky about us not letting our cell phone switched on 24/7. Guessed many students in the past did get lost a lot.

Epic failure looking for WIFI: we walked from Starbucks to local café and could not find any free WiFi. Dartmouth really spoilt us with 24/7 Wifi. At the end, I gave up and went to the Internet café few blocks away from my home.

For those who asked me about guys: yes, they are cute!! Come in a package of huge sideburns, soft curly brown hair and difficult to tell whether there are straight or not! (just had an experience in the bus, where I observed two cute guys caressing each other on the lap, talking to a pretty lady who was sitting in front of them at the same time. No big deal!) *one more fun fact, our university IS situated in the gay zoneJ

Observation of the day:

- the elevators of my apartment is where neighbors catch up

- supermarket cashiers flirt(or communicate) with people loudly (Cashier to customer:Hola Caliente! Hey sexy)

- older couples do not give way to the young ones when it comes to holding hands and kissing each other in public. So sweet….

Sept 20

An account at 4am :

Just back from my first nightlife experience in Barcelona. A city that never sleeps!

Bars and Pubs run till 1 am and clubs only start receiving crowds at 1 30 am and all the way till dawn.

The house music gotten a little boring after a while when none of us are willing to pay much for drinks. Most of us were sober :P Sexy bitch by Akon is the only song I got excited dancing to. The rest of the time, I am avoiding bumping into the person next to me. Have I grown out of this? In one of the most notorious night scene, yet I was spacing out?

Woke up at 2.30 pm the same day and still didn’t miss lunch. Did I mention lunch only take place at 3.30pm? This will be the most difficult culture adjustment for the whole trip. Haha. Consciously made up my mind not to join the rest to the beach, because I did not want to be too tired before my first day of class. Instead, I joined my host sister, Maria del Mar and her friends for a Spanish movie called “Gordo (fat)”. (no I did not understand everything, but I got the idea)

The movie is nothing along the lines of ‘slim is good’ BUT about living in our most comfortable self. It started with a therapist trying to ‘cure’ the fat people who came to him: A lady who fears her long distance bf found out about her weight gain; an ex promoter of slimming pills who turns fat and became gay (inferior to woman); a guy whose from a whole ancestry of fat relatives and never know the word slim, and a religious couple that consist a slim guy and a plump pretty lady.

Turns out there are really nothing wrong with the clients but the therapist. He is obsessed with PERFECTION, that when his perfectly slim wife got pregnant, he did not even dare to neither look at her in the eyes nor touch her at night. He even missed his baby’s birth by hooking up with the first lady I mentioned.

Most of the clients lose some weight and at the end gain back the weight, because they were convinced that ‘fat’ is what preventing them from happiness. But at the end, happiness is right in front of them that they do not have the guts to appreciate.

The first lady found her happiness by having affairs with strangers; the ex promoter found his happiness with a woman who did not care he was gay (of course he wasn’t just too scared); the fat guy got back together with his wife after a huge fight of questioning whether he is the father of his thin son; and after breaking up with her bf due to her weight loss (thinking that she can find a better man), the plump pretty lady realized that her ex is indeed her true love.

At the end, the therapist went out of business and his wife stopped talking to him. Despite the ‘horrendous’ sex scene of fat people, (European movie have lots of nudity!) the movie is truly inspiring.

Went back home for a 10 30 pm dinner! Help!

That marks my first few days in Barcelona. Happy Belated Birthday to my dad and mom!

Orientation and BArcelona (click!)

2009-09-21T09:14:00.001-04:00

Counting down my days to Barcelona LSA

2009-09-02T22:02:00.004-04:00

Dear Readers,

I am not abandoning this blog. It's just that things are quite intense and difficult to explain in blogs nowadays.

After all the crazy traveling around half the globe and then many many hours of car rides, my sister is finally in safe hands ( her University) studying one year ahead of me for a College degree. Yes, I am still a Sophomore, and she's a Junior now.

So, the sister part is done. I am back to my Dartmouth bubble. Smart enough to create a short film about Dartmouth bubble, but still clumsy to miss the official screening of the film! ( I mixed up the date and time, duh?) Anyways, I emailed out the youtube links to my friends on campus and of course posted the video online in my blog, hopefully that compensates my idiotic actions. ( I was playing basketball when the time the movie was supposed to screen...grrrr)

The rest of my time? I am trying to catch the last few glimpse of the sunny days and waiting for my buddies to return to campus. My flowery shirts and hot pants are about to be kept into the box, its freaking cold here even its sunny. Luckily, yesterday, we got to enjoy a little nature 15 minutes away from campus-- its call the Ledges, and the scenery is pretty nice, we do not need to hike in order to reach there, that's the pretty part of it :P

We sat on that big rock for one hour of sunshine. Of course the blacks do not need sunscreen as they do not get sunburn!!:P

After that, we went for a Chinese buffet in town and then a game of bowling. All and all, it was a fruitful day, a little tired due to the little climbing (scratched my thigh due to wearing shorts) and the little bowling.

My video for the Summer Art Exhibition "Screening eMotions"

2009-08-27T21:02:00.000-04:00

photos from California!

2009-08-18T17:03:00.003-04:00

Photos from Bangkok! (click)

2009-08-10T13:36:00.002-04:00

Fond Memories

2009-07-27T03:17:00.004-04:00

What I used to do:

#1-- attending Chinese Orchestra Practices : contributing my "strength" in banging those big drums and timpani, admiring how well we played at several instances ( now listening to the CD my teacher lend me), always guessing our standards and how far we are in National level...hahhaa

#2-- way of Shopping : trying to remember everything I see in one day before buying them, after window shopping, too tired to go back to the place where my noted items lies, go home empty handed, satisfied for not spending money ...( :-D)

#3-- talking Celeb : never miss any entertainment programs from Astro, waiting for that moment where the MC pairs up the most-talk-about couples, where they never fail to disappoint us over and over again by just distancing themselves away from each other.... with that shy smile..geram..(:<)

#4-- Mamak : eating indian food by the streets, starring at the big screen over football match, pretending that I know anything about football and converse to guy friends about them, catching up about each other's love life.(:P) *Weird that I have not done that in the two weeks I am back..hmmm*

#5-- Stalking friends on friendster, blogs, yahoo photos (facebook doesn't even exist back then:P)

#6-- Pasar Malam: food, food, food , and pirated DVDs of course

#7-- Korean Dramas: cute guys, romantic plots and the dreamy atmosphere where the kisses took place...ahhhh

Weirdly, I didn't do much of it since I am home. All has become too strange for me since being far away from home..old habits were replaced by new ones...still its fun to look back and smile....

and there's only us....

2009-07-26T01:43:00.002-04:00

Yasmin Ahmad just passed away yesterday. I have not been following her blog and work like my sister does, but knowing that there's someone working on making Malaysia a better place, I felt safe.

Yes, another death after Michael Jackson, Ming fu...all concern individuals who worked to 'change' the world....Many of my friends shared similar childhood memories like mine where we danced to MJ's music without really knowing the issue he is campainging for-- race, AIDS, Africa nor about his pathetic rumours, and in my case, his gender ( my 5 year-old mind was set to think that girls has long hair, and guys have short hair); Ming fu who died innocently falling off from a government building was a passion young man with visions in Malaysian politics; A friend of mine, upon receiving the text messages of Yasmin's death, ran out from our table in tears. The impact of these people in our hearts is clear, we need them, we want them to do what they do best.

I guess God is constantly trying to remind us how fragile life is, that everyone does have a responsibility for the world we live in. Doesn't mean that one King of Pop is in place, we do not need to work harder to transcend the music industry from Michael Jackson. We wish that there will be always someone out there doing the job of art creation, peace-keeping, conflict resolution for us, but Death comes, and there's only us left to work the rest of the world's problems out, only us.....

Tributes for Yasmin Ahmad

taken from STAR online:

Yasmin Ahmad - a talented storyteller and film director, does not only show her creativity through film making, but in the film making itself, it speaks louder than 10000 written words. I remember watching all her Petronas Ads at one go and couldn't wait for the next Ads whether during Independence day or any other festive seasons - because it never fails to warm my heart with the message of unity, love, and forgiveness. May you rest in Peace Yasmin, even though you have passed on, but your work, what you have left behind will FOREVER be etched in all our hearts. - Elaine Leong

Getting a twitter update in the wee hours of the morning today was definitely heart breaking and devastating. Yasmin Ahmad was more than just an incredible filmaker, she was an inspiring individual not just to me but to everyone out there. This noble lady should be commended on her tremendous effort of producing heart -touching ads which portrays the true Malaysia. She has given us the gift that we will definitely treasure. Rest in peace Yasmin Ahmad, as you never fail to inspire me everyday although being thousands of miles away. - Yuvha Dharshini, Auckland, New Zealand.

Before Sepet came along, I always have this negative feeling about Malaysian made movies. That all change because of Sepet. It made me laugh and cry at the same time, a quality that has been missing from Malaysian movies. Yasmin's theme of 1Malaysia which is only advocated by our prime minister recently has been in her movies and commercials for a long time. Though I may not have known Yasmin Ahmad personally but her personal work (commercials and movies) touched my heart personally, for that I feel like I have lost a friend. If Michael Jackson's passing is wept by the world, I think Yasmin's passing should be wept by all Malaysian regardless of race, religion or ethnic, a true hero of 1Malaysia. A great talent she definitely is. She shall be missed. - CHU SP

San Francisco (click)

2009-07-12T00:58:00.002-04:00

Santa Cruz (click)

2009-07-12T00:52:00.003-04:00

graffiti wall

2009-07-06T22:15:00.003-04:00

Watermelon eating

2009-07-06T22:14:00.000-04:00

Summer Pictures!(click)

2009-07-06T21:33:00.002-04:00

Summer Art Exhibition by Si Jie Loo

2009-07-05T21:13:00.002-04:00

My installation blurb for the public:

June 30 - July 7, 2009 - Carson/Novack Carridor.

Through various rites and patterns such as DOC trips, the culture of wearing "flares", the Greek scene, the bonfire and the striving for academic achievement, Dartmouth manages to structure our emotions. This structuring of emotion tends to stifle more impromptu expressions outside these boundaries, because we carefully pick and choose how to express our ourselves to match suit these occasions and everyday rituals. Consequently, we run the risk of forgetting how to express ourselves outside of these boundaries.

In this public art project, I attempt to create a scenario that allows Dartmouth community members to express their hidden emotions. By putting a "Grafitti" wall and a display of "nostalgic" toys in public space, I anticipate the direct interaction between the art and its viewers, with each spectator reacting to what has been expressed before. In this way, one will be able to see how emotions can be experienced, related, and relayed. The public display of art brings people together at a personal level. This project aims to provide a public setting for Dartmouth community to express their private emotions and to recognize, unexpectedly, each other's emotions in a setting where they are customarily hidden within traditions, social patterns, and expectations.

Fun in the Summer @ Dartmouth (click)

2009-06-25T11:15:00.002-04:00

Before going home!!
haha

Reunions

2009-06-21T14:31:00.002-04:00

Picture from Dartmouth Homepage: Class of 1949

Reunion is a very interesting phenomenon in Dartmouth. Every year, right after Graduation, where you send off the latest batch of Seniors, Dartmouth welcomes back graduates of 5, 10, 15 and up to 50 years!! Since this is 2009, the class of 1949( those who graduated 50 years ago and are 70++ years of age) celebrates their 50th year reunion.

Within 10 days, tents are set up in almost every patch of green ( field) you can find on campus: In front of library, in between dorms, back of the church etc. Every time I past by those tents, I see graduates of the same year, reminiscing their years in Dartmouth and sharing about their current lives.

In the ten days, I was experiencing a phase of life of MANKIND and expectations that follows in a particular age. As the 10 days progressed, the age of the graduates become younger and younger, from 70 ++, to 65++, 60, 50, 55 and finally the last batch of 25++).In those tents,wine glasses and fancy gowns and coats slowly transformed into beer in plastic cups and casual jeans and dress ;Music from the 50s slowly progresses to rock n roll, soft rock and live band concert; and People strolled in the form of 2, 5, 2, 5. How do you explain this? So the old graduates (60 to 70 years old) come back in 2 (obviously their children are not with them), the couples in the mid 30s to 50s come in 5 ( they have big vans and all their children tagged along, its a family trip), the engaged couple in their late 20s and early 30s come in 2, and finally the graduates who are single come in 5 ( with their best friends from college).

As for the students who are working for the reunion like me, work very hard to accommodate to these Alumni. We work in catering, housing ( they live in the dorms) and additional programs for the family. Dinning tables and dorm rooms are designed differently to suit the need of the Alumni. Students babysits, play with the teenagers, serve dinners in the tents, clean the rooms etc. As for me, I worked with the toddlers ( children from 2-5 years old, they are soooo cute!), playing games, making crafts and coloring. During the program, I hear almost identical conversations from the parents: how they talk about their kids, how they talk to their kids, how they talk about Dartmouth, etc.

For me, this reunion is not about the successful, loyal and wealthy alumni, but the REALITY of life. It amazed me and scared me at the same time how most people do the same thing at certain age! NO matter who we are, we are FOLLOWING the circle of life: graduate, develop a career, settle down, start a family, maintaining the family, retire and companionship. Even our taste for music, wine, food evolved as we aged( we are still doing the same thing like the rest!) .Are we forced to do this? We are in such hurry that we always give ourselves a limit by setting goals so that we can meet with all these expectations,for example, " I have to figure myself out ( passion, ambition, purpose of life) within this 5 years, so that I can have a job and get married!" " I have to know about wine tasting at the age of 30!"

How many of us are planning to stick to this PHASE OF LIFE that I see in this reunion and how many of us are not?

Graduation 2009

2009-06-14T13:43:00.003-04:00

Picture: President Wright's last graduation ceremony at Dartmouth.

Witnessed for the first time what it's like to graduate from Dartmouth.987 Seniors in their Graduation gown, showing off their titles ( membership to a Senior society, secret society, black-American society etc) with a scarf or a cane in their hands, with their family sitting behind them, cheering when their names are called. Graduation is indeed a significant moment in life, one of the moment that you always look back to, whether to look for the best times of life where you achieve things, reach for the sky,and are allowed to search for the self , make mistakes, choose your passion, and maybe to KNOW.

You are allowed to be confuse, to try new things, to fit in, to be original. As I read back my posts from Thailand, I noticed that I told myself, " if you can't change the environment, let the environment change you, or fit in, or be one of them! " I optimistically chose the later, thinking that there's nothing wrong to fit in. But in Dartmouth, fitting in becomes a matter of principles, values, boundaries and the self. Was I not myself when I try to fit into the Thai community? Am I defending the 'self' when I refuse to be a REGULAR Dartmouth student? That always become a dilemma.

I teared when I listened to the Commencement Speaker, Louise Erdrich, talking about her experience being the first batch of women and the first batch of Native American in Dartmouth back in the 1972. She's now a well-known poet and writer. She talked about the experience of "fear". "The only two things we fear are perhaps failure and humiliation, but without taking things personally, we will move forward". She motivates us to conquer fear, and most of all, have love(for the world) alongside with whatever things we are pursuing in life.

Most speakers at the ceremony, including the President, the valedictorian (perfect GPA graduate) and Louise Erdrich pull in different instances so that we are connected to them. The murals in the library, the lone pine, the snow sculpture and even the famous drinking game , Pong, on campus. The lesson to take home is perhaps, whoever you are, graduate or not, you'll always belong to Dartmouth. The Dartmouth experience will always be shared generations after generations, starting from strolling on the campus where many have come and go, to the different traditions that we are all made to believe and love.

Maybe, at the end of my Dartmouth years, I will learn how to love the traditions: the bonfire, the winter carnival, the night outs in fraternities and sororities (which are mostly events for partying and drinking).Though at this moment, I still do not believe these experiences can answer the question of "who I am", but more like, " we are sons and daughters of Dartmouth because we did all these things, therefore we are family and therefore I will return you any favor for that!" Maybe, in the middle of all the traditions, we will find our 'self's. Maybe finding the 'self' and finding the connections are two different agenda. Friends became assets and stepping stones in addition to the simple form of soul mates. What do I want to carry away from this institution?

Performance day with good weather!(click)

2009-05-21T19:29:00.002-04:00

Random Pictures from May

2009-05-18T23:57:00.000-04:00

enjoy!

Coming up concert on Wednesday!!(click)

2009-05-18T23:53:00.004-04:00

Some pictures from my rehearsal...
my camera is rusty. need to use it ....:P

Just performed...

2009-04-17T22:33:00.003-04:00

Some drumming before the prospective students.

Americans are lucky here, once they got accepted, they could come stay in Dartmouth where the current students will lend the "floor" to them for the weekend.

Students will put up skits and performance show to impress them, so that they would come to Dartmouth. Before and After acceptance is a different story. Now Dartmouth is begging these prospies to come to this prestige institute.

Dartmouth is so crowded these few days that it feels more like a school now. Usually I barely see people talking with each other on the street or socializing on the big green field. One friend told me, " if you see friendly and smiley people, they are the prospies". Since when Dartmouth students are not smiley and friendly? Guess we are just so used to our specific friends that we forget how to smile to strangers.

My Rhetoric class today discussed about photo tampering ( basically editing photo into a way that makes different arguement). The first picture we saw was Brangelina. Apparent the beach picture of the couple is a fake, but people are still stunned by it. Then we look at how people crop picture to let it look different. A chaotic picture become heroic when the mess is cropped out and the struggling people became hero.

Most of all, we learned that "American Idol" is just a fulfillment of criticism and how audience react to the different types of people on stage. Their votes actually represent Americans values. This year American Idol sees the outstanding Adam who is a openly gay, a Christian, and a 17 year old with red hair. Who will America vote? After Obama, is American ready for gay as their American Idol?

Not to mentioned "British got Talent" Susan Boyle, a 47 year old, unemployed contestant, singing her lung outs and turned the crowed into tears. Is Success only connected to Youth and Beauty? Will you be shocked if she is a young, beautiful woman?

In this cynical world, "abnormal" people have to work extra hard to achieve their dream....

I keep....

2009-04-17T17:13:00.001-04:00

tripping myself from the stairs...
my right knee is green now and I almost fell again 5 seconds ago.

Havard UWC reunion

2009-04-12T19:49:00.001-04:00

A+ and drinking

2009-04-09T01:49:00.002-04:00

I personally think that I manage my time well. But nothing can go any worse if you arrange time for a "Time Management" workshop.

So their tips for me:
Lay out your GOALS
and how you specifically can reach the goal
then arrange the action towards the goal into your timetable ( must be an overall weekly plan)

well, basically its law of attraction all over again. So think, act, receive.
am annoyed with ppl always saying, " You are Dartmouth students, I know you are all brilliant, Your goal must be achieving A+, so you have to study EVERYDAY" Oh god. PLLLEASE.

After sending more emails to some prospective international students and urge them to join our international community, I sat by a Cafe, trying to finish off my Spanish homework and readings for my SOCY class. Tough reading. Greg, the protagonist of the " Life on the Color Line" is a Black and White mix but looks totally white. He suffers all the time from questions like " why are you with the blacks" " you are at the wrong side of the line" and " go to the back row of the bus". His father is drunk more often than sober and the school just wouldn't give him the Honor award he deserves as the highest achiever in school. after having spent so much money on his suits and getting his father and grandmother to the ceremony, his name was never called. I felt his disappointment.

Meanwhile, guys and girls with shinny outfit strolled by me. They call those shinny colorful outfit " flare", no particular function why people dress that way, its just how it is to party here. Yes, wednesday nights are big here. People go to fraternities to "socialize" by drinking of course.
Fraternities are basically "brotherhood" houses where the "brothers" invite people to their basement and play 'Pong' (kinda like table tennis) game and socialize. Yes, that's how Dartmouth people networks towards their future career, and I am not even joking.

Even my Spanish class today superficially uses " Which fraternity is better?" for Comparative practice. I dislike this overemphasized frat culture. Why not admire things with a better sense of taste than the atmosphere of the dirty frat basement?

I miss the times in Bangkok- where going out means sitting in the bar, chatting with sophisticated people introduced by Father Joe(and get the whole night paid by the bar owner), or get together with ppl of the common aim of doing good work in Mercy Centre. Sometimes we the young volunteers go out and meet people from different background, sipping a glass of wine or two, telling life stories with occasionally dancing and drumming with the guitarist on stage.

Or Summer in Kuala Lumpur- hopping from restaurants to restaurants trying delicious seafood and French dessert, never lack of good company to talk about the world from our heart and soul.

Waking up from my "night" dreaming, I came back to the " Oh my gosh, Harrot ( name of one fraternaty) is full of hot atheletes, we should TOTALLY go there....." culture.

Luckily that is not the only culture available here.

Peace.

"Writing is like Kissing"

2009-04-07T22:57:00.003-04:00

3 courses I am taking for this term :

Spanish 2

Rhetoric of Power and Subversion

Multiracial Identity

What I am doing this term :

World Percussion Music Ensemble

START- Student Teaching in Art

Research Assistant- Anthropology
-program development around Tibet and the Himalayas, with a specific focus on Yunnan.

America Reading- founded under Bill Clinton Administration where Undergraduates student Read for School Kids
_____________________________________________________________

It is impossible to describe my daily life if you do not know the above information. ESSENTIAL. Everything is related to those above. After attending an Academic Skills Session where the advisor scared me that PEOPLE FORGET COMPLETELY WHAT THEY ABSORB AFTER 3 DAYS WITHOUT REVISE, I decided to keep up with my life, for I longed to write a biography just like Obama did with his " Dreams of my father".

I thought I was going to wake up early today to secure my campus housing in the summer. Guess my brain know that is not as urgent as my slumber. My brain tends to know how to procrastinate. I am pleased with it. Whenever I decide to tune my alarm to 8 am even if my class starts at 11 am, I wake up just in time ( 10 am today) to have breakfast, read through my class material before 11 am. So even if I am technically late for whatever my plans are for the day, I still end up completing my tasks. GOOD JOB, BRAIN!

The night before, I have imported the Audio CD of " Dreams of my father" into my IPOD Touch. Ipod touch is my best friend. It never fails me. I could do so much with it: Games, Timetable, Emails, Music, and now listen to Obama read his own book. Having his voice right next to my ear is a magical moment. His rhythmic description about his childhood just made me forget that I am alone in the cafeteria ( most of the time I would have start searching for familliar faces to sit with). Eating my Omlet with ham, spinach and mushroom ( i have given up cheese) , I learnt that when Obama moved to Indonesia with his mom together with Lolo, his stepfather, he was culturely shock about things that I am very familiar in my childhood: Beggars on the streets, seeing someone cutting a chicken alive, leeches, boys fighting , learning Indonesian(Malayish), learning to be strong, and Orang Utans. Instantly, I connected with him.

Why do I do this? "Dreams of my Father" is actually my textbook for my "Multiracial identity" class. Our class studies the identity crisis faced by people born in multiracial blackground and perhaps associate it with multicultural. I was raised up monocultural. However, as I move forward towards the world, I see things in multicultural perspective. I am no longer belong to only one ethnic. Interesting enough, I only learnt recently that the term " ethnic " means cultural group, and not race. One's etnicity can change but one's racial identity do not change. Due to the fact that I am both racially chinese and ethnicly one too, I never consider cases such as people's whose ethnically different than his or her race.

After breakfast, I went to my Spanish Class. I was accepted to go to Barcelona and Mexico for Dartmouth's Language Study Abroad (LSA) program. It is hard to choose between the two and for a long time, I remained confuse. But after some debating and discussion with family and friends, I decided to settle for Mexico and participate in a Korean Exchange Program in September. Therefore, I must take this Spanish Class. My professora makes class dynamic. We did "Comparative and Superlative" today where we compare the wealth and beauty of Hollywood stars. Superficial but we learnt. Most Americans in the class said: " Tom Cruise is more crazy than .....( another star)". ( As usual, I am the only international in the class)

Due to this Spanish class, I missed my signing up session to monitor in the Music Department ( Door guarding where you unlock doors for students to practice, boring but good pay). World Economic Crisis makes me extra nervous about my on-campus job. I already lost 2 jobs this term because of department budget cuts. Therefore, yesterday I have been to interview with different professors and emailing prospective job supervisor. Luckily, or Dramatically, the sign up sheet that was full has only 6 days a week ( how could this happen?!) . So I noticed and told my supervisor," Where's Saturday?" and I ended up having a 4 hours slot on Saturday for door guarding.( just my luck)

Then, more luck came in. My friend from China, Yuxiang, have a ticket to a Dance performance tonight but he could not attend. He gave me the ticket for free and I thanked him forever ( It was the best ballet/contemporary dance I have seen so far). After that I went to Collis, the student centre for some emailing before class. I declined another job offer because I got a job for the Research Assistant ( refer above)! I will be collaborating with professors from in and out of Dartmouth to held events on the topics of Tibet and China. A job that is both experience enhancing and educational. Meanwhile, two students were flirting right infront of me. They thought I couldn't hear them since I have my headphones on, but one was telling the other , " 你知道我很喜欢你吗” GOOSEBUMPS.

Then, it wass time for my MULTIRACIAL CLASS . Let me call it SOCY class. I mistaken a floor, so I have to ran back down a level ( embarrassing only for myself , nobody notice). Things learnt from today's class : African American are extremely sensitive with the word " Nigger". I thought it was an African thing and that if people are open-minded, it didn't matter to say it. I WAS WRONG. Throughout the class, nobody say the whole word. They just said, "The N world..blabla..." I was so curious why and I say, " Me and my African friends joke about it all the time , " and then 3 people immediately blast back to me, "Are they black?"" are they Black Americans?"" Its important, especially Blacks from the south" " My parents hate this word". Wowwowowow! See, that's how interesting is my class, we step on each other tail to examine this sensitive topics. Apparently, certain schools even forbit the use the N word in the first day of school just to avoid futher fighting. Everybody remembers back in 1950s, people still hang Black men on the trees ( they call this "lynching") when they looked at White girls. This memory is still fresh and not erasable yet. That's why multiracial kids sometimes admire their parents courage to be together despite all the critisism. Our class needs to write essay to talk about our own racial experience and that's when our professor said, " Writing is just like Kissing : everybody thought they are good kissers, but they can never know. Depending who you kiss, somebody thinks you kiss well and some don't. As long as you express yourself and are grammatically correct, I am fine with that!" What a quote to share!

I took a nap before going to my Spanish Drill Session. Basically is a 50 minutes time for students to DRILL in all the new Spanish words into their head by repeating out loud. We do look dumb but it really helps!

PEAK of the day happens after Spanish Class. I watched the best performance BY Paul Taylor Dance Company. He has been in the Dance world for over 60 years! he is the founder of the Taylor dance company and still direct after retiring as a performer in 1975. I could never predict such creative modern movements come from the tall old man standing on stage.

There are many hidden messages in the dance:

Dancers are actors, their expression in their dance kept me engage in Taylors "conversation" to the audience and help me understand his message.

Moments that I enjoyed most : A swan princess who was not able to fly -- we have seen beautiful dancers as the elegant swan princess, but who have thought off a swan princess with flappy wings that move so fast but still fail to fly. The dancer was on point the whole time, moving quickly around the same spot, "flapping" her arms. I could feel her tideous effort and misery trying to live up to her "status". Hearing the laughter around the auditorium, I think Taylor is trying to say, " Can't we fail at times? " and " It's equally impressive for a dancer to perform success AND failure of something, in this case the Swan princess".

Then, we have a gender switch in the skit of the Spaniard bull fighter. The bulls are 3 nervous men and on stage, they kept running away from the female Spaniard bull-fighter;

Couple dancing in a french (suppose to be romantic)outfit, but they never manage to stay in sync and constantly fighting and try to knock each other on the floor ( who says couples have to show they are in love with each other when dancing?)

Then there's a women trying to be sexy and seductive but again, failed miserably. Everytime she try to take off her gloves and bit her lips, her gloves wouldn't come off! hahaha.

Its like mime, all presented without words, just classical music, nothing has changed in the staging, costumes or music, except the dance movements and actors' expression.

The last dance that take my breath away : many dancers dressed in different colours running around the stage, They ran hard ( just like ppl work hard in life ) , and they ran rotating around a person ( significes time) , and they ran in all directions ( confusion and future) , and then they always find someone , they either jump onto the hugs of the men or cling onto each other and do more running ( there's always that special one that supports and care nearby ), though sometimes they dont' notice , they are doing the same time, sometimes they don't. ( you just have to search for people with common interest and "dance"together in life) , Sometimes its the same movement but happen in different time , ( we either adjust our pace to follow or wait for each other, we live in groups, not alone)

Basically they are JUST RUNNING. But from their runs, I discover all the life principles.

I am not alone in search for knowledge. My fate is waiting, there's someone waiting, there's someone helping and guiding me, there's always someone.

Miami volunteering pictures ( click)

2009-03-30T17:22:00.005-04:00

Miami, Washing D.C chilling out pictures ( click)

2009-03-30T17:22:00.004-04:00

What we do when we are not working.
LOTS of driving and some of these ....

Tribute to my Writing Class(click)

2009-03-08T21:32:00.002-04:00

Boston Mini RCN Reunion (click)

2009-03-08T21:16:00.002-04:00

Dartmouth's New President (Press)

2009-03-02T15:10:00.003-05:00

Me and my friends thought it is the Obama effect, since this is the first Asian President we have in Dartmouth. Everyone is excited!

Part 4 Revised

2009-03-01T17:41:00.000-05:00

I uploaded it again, see if it works.

Press the same part 4 again

Kofi and Her Drum Last Part

2009-02-28T22:10:00.000-05:00

Kofi and Her drum Part 5

2009-02-28T22:09:00.000-05:00

Kofi and Her Drum Part 4

2009-02-28T16:33:00.002-05:00

Kofi and her drum Part 3

2009-02-28T13:44:00.000-05:00

Kofi and Her Drum Part 2

2009-02-28T02:23:00.000-05:00

Concert: Kofi and Her Drum Part 1

2009-02-28T02:21:00.000-05:00

How can I forget about the drumming that I love so much?

2009-02-26T23:19:00.001-05:00

As I was looking at clips of the jamming of the electric guitars, I was thinking about my drumming.

In my opinion, the contrast and harmonizing of the rhythms in drumming portrays a conversation more than a self-expression. Drumming in different tones shows two or more people talking: they are not fighting, but just trying to be peace with each other.
When one drum is loud, the others try to be softer. They never try to outshine one another. No matter how different their tones sound, together they are harmonizing and conveying the drummer’s emotion. No drum can be outstanding without the help from the other drums. One
tone does not produce music; Music needs multiple tones.

As I watched people of different races and background come together for the Woodstock concert, I was imagining the harmonious rhythm produced by the different sets of drum. They are adapting to each other tones, always looking out at the other players before deciding when is their turn to join. Rhythms are added to attract but not distract, inspire but not interrupt.

When it s your turn to play, everybody else will remain silent. In jamming, all drummers are equal: they take care of each other and make sure everybody is heard.

Rock n’Roll vs Chinese Love Song

2009-02-26T23:10:00.002-05:00

My creative response to my Writing class about Rock and Roll: ( I love Elvis, he's so cute!)whispered the whole class of female:P

Despite his ‘vulgar’ movements, Elvis Presley gets attention. People are drawn to his true self. Is the revelation of ‘self’ the same as revelation of body? Not everybody wants to see a bare self, stripped off. The older generation reacts as if he is nude in public. Nudity symbolizes both beauty and vulnerability. If young people see beauty in nudity, I would argue that the older generations see Elvis ‘nudity’ as a revelation of their own vulnerability.

Similarly, vulnerability is in Rock n’ Roll. Rock n’ Roll is about a generation of young people expressing their vulnerable selves: they have no control of their own destiny, for they are ordered to go to war. In other words, they have no freedom and are powerless.
America, as God’s country, fails to give freedom to the people because they stand by the notion of being responsible for the world. Even if one argues that Dostoevsky’s idea of being guilty for each other is what drives America to war, America is wrong to use their power in the process. The war and the peoples’ reluctance have shown that equality has been removed from Christianity’s notion of Love and responsibility for each other, leaving people powerless.
However, Rock n’ Roll manages to change the powerless to the powerful. Through the electric guitars, expressive musicians like Jimmy Hendrix and Santana provide an imaginary space of freedom and power. Their anger in their rhythms conveysa young generation who do not submit themselves to America’s power.

The other side of the world experiences a different phenomenon. None of the music resembles the expressiveness of Rock n’ Roll. Most Asian music is about the Love song, in which the singer is willing to sacrifice for an impossible love. The submissiveness to love portrays a society that is submissive to the authority. People are willing to ignore the flaws of reality (in both love and power) and only sing about the utopia of their dreams. Unlike Rock n Roll, through which people find the mysterious space of freedom in the musicians’ single note, the space of idealism is revealed through the lyrics in the Chinese love songs.

Therefore Rock n’ Roll and Chinese Love Songs portray the submissiveness of people towards power. If Americans escape to Rock n’ Roll to express their anger for their country, Chinese escape into the songs of utopia that they have yet to get from their country.

Once in a while, I replay some cheesy love songs. Perhaps, I too, crave the ideal Prince-charming that only exists through songs but not real life, because we can only dream about someone with ‘”5 Cs” (Singaporean dream: Cars, Condo, Credit Cards, Cash and Career)!

Winter Carnival

2009-02-15T23:55:00.004-05:00

snow sculpture (behind me ) that was supposed to be a house collapsed because of the sudden warm weather!

but obviously people will still continue to celebrate winter carnival, a week of drinking, snow sports and parties. Keggie the Keg (the metal thing) is Dartmouth's unofficial symbol ( beer bottle) . yes apparently we are known for drinking.

but my time is spent wisely, such as having dinner with our beloved Prof - Karen(left) . She teaches in our Writing International course , and she's also Zeng zi mo's teacher.

what a coincidence, winter carnival during valentines day. So we have campaign against women violence by holding a "Vagina Monologue". This lady here portray different "mournes" ( yes sex mournes) in the play that cracked up the audience completely.

International Ball and Sons of Lwala(Press)

2009-02-01T19:24:00.004-05:00

Once in a year, we have all international students playing dress up and go to a ball in the nearest ( only) Inn .

Not too bad an experience at all, considering there is nice food and nice music to dance to. I start dancing from 10- 2:30 am. Totally exhausted.

The not so related to the ball pictures are from my International Writing Class. We got together to listen to our guests, the Ochieng Brothers from Kenya, who also attended our Professor's class about 7 or 8 years ago to speak about them building up a clinic in their rural hometown in Kenya from scratch. Their own experience is very related to our theme of the Course : From Suffering comes Love. Without suffering ( their parents died from AIDS), they will not be able to push themselves to do good for their community and bring Love and Healthcare to their own people.

Milton and Fred Ochieng both rewarded the Martin Luther King Jr. Social Justice Award and selected by the ABC news as the people of the week.

That same night, they also joined the dance party and danced the night off!

Happy Chinese New Year!

2009-01-27T19:39:00.003-05:00

Writing good wishes for the people during a CNY celebration on Sunday.

Luncheon with President Wright

2009-01-27T19:06:00.002-05:00

My apologies for the lack of graphic descriptions in my blog these days.

You should understand that everyday, I took at least 10 minutes dressing up ( not making up), making sure that I have my woolen hats, gloves, enough layers of clothes and pants plus a big fat jacket , plus my keys, wallet and ipod touch before going to anywhere. Therefore , my big fat Camera is really out of the picture.

So we have this email system in Dartmouth called Blitz, where everything that happens in school will be forward to your inbox, and it is completely up to us whether to take it up in our schedule or throw it into our trashbox. So last week , these " Luncheon with President" email came in and invites the student body to sign up for tha lunch with our own President, which btw , is serving his last year as President in Dartmouth. I asked myself, " Why not?" and send my name over.

There I was with 11 other students in President Wrights' office, having lunch and talk about anything. I thought I had to act ' sophisticated' and was prepared to talk about budget cuts and the searching of the new president. But suprisingly, our conversation went to the direction that I am most familiar with:- stereotypes, culture shock ( coming to Dartmouth) and fitting in.

You think that only International students may face such problem adapting to the Dartmouth life , but it turns out that many students are insecure to just hunt for things in school that might be their "notch". Some of us talked about students who just hang out with people of their own interest, notably the atheletes, popular people, musicians, etc, and some complained that they are frustrated by the drinking on campus that just dominate the whole Dartmouth culture.

I provided some of my thoughts about fitting in as an International student, suggesting people to engage in converations to understand each others' different rather than to attach ourselves into groups. President Wright pointed out a recent study of an Economics Professor who study our 'Blitzing' ( emailing) during off terms. Many students who use the blitz keep in touch with homogenious groups, whites with whites, atheletes with atheletes etc. But ideally, why mix with people that will only reinforce but not challenges your ideas and priciples? He challenges us to meet people from diverse backgrounds who are already there in Dartmouth and learn to think beyond our established mentality.

Moreover, President Wright also explain the significance of Dartmouth Education vs a Dartmouth Degree. When I pointed out that Dartmouth is not that well known accross the world, He agrees that it is the Dartmouth Education that will make a difference in our career rather than the degree itselfs. Not many understand the education Dartmouth offers: the freedom to pick and choose among millions of opportunities on campus, to really explore our own interest and vision for the world, to interact with the people and form friendships from US students and beyond, engage in activism to scientific research alongside with faculty of high qualification... and the list goes on.

Buried among the competition to strive for academic excellence and prestigeous career in the future, this lunch reaffirms my vision for myself, to go for the Dartmouth Education. Just like old times when I chase after the UWC education over an IB diploma, I will continue to search for things that made me passionate, like I always do, without feeling guilty about it!

"-ISH"

2009-01-22T20:43:00.002-05:00

I find "-ish" very amusing . It's a very slang word, so I have to hang around long enough to realize how frequently do Americans use it.

Especially in my dancing class, my teacher will say, " so you do this, and then stretch your hands to this position, and pose, get it? -ISH? "

Guess everybody understand that it means " you almost get it? "
You can also frame it as an answer, such as, " Do you get what I mean?" " -ish(almost)."
Sometimes I get crazy over this phrase, cause even if you understand only the tip of the iceberg, you can still say "-ish", therefore it is never a good measure to know whether he or she understand the question.

I got miserable handing in my Math homework lately because the question does not only ask for an answer ( which is usually numerical), usually there is an additional question of " Explain why."
In "Asia", whatever, I was taught to just plug in formulas and that's it. you got the answer. However, this American system of Math requires you to FULLY understand Mathematics ( including the history and how the formula came about ), you need to write 50 words after an answer to prove you totally get it.

At this moment, I wish I could write : The answer is 2a + b, -ish.

More Pictures!!(click)

2008-12-28T23:01:00.003-05:00

One more week before the next semester. Can't wait to go back!
But I love being around with my aunt and her family! It's so nice to have the Malaysian touch in the U.S life.

pic: Singing Karaoke for hours ~! Oldies from many many years ago!! cool hahaha

2008-12-24T23:43:00.001-05:00

My aunt and her family!

From left clockwise: Aunty Mitchell, Daphne(7), Jadan(2) and Uncle Jack.

Virginia is for lovers (click)

2008-12-23T22:52:00.001-05:00

Lots of food, lots of "sex on the beach" aka sushi and cocktails!

8 years reunion!

2008-12-18T16:54:00.003-05:00

I guess the picture speaks for itself. Ken treated me a Chocolate Fondue after a delicious Japanese dinner.

Central Park and Broadway!(click)

2008-12-16T03:17:00.003-05:00

God heard my prayers and gave me perfect weather after the 2 days of freezing cold.

After the dizzy merry-go-round business in the Subway ( I got lost again), I met Jose at the Natural History Museum, only to cancel our Museum trip for a long stroll in Central Park, which is right opposite the Museum. How can we resist the temptation of the nice weather, we didn't even need to wear our sweater!

Some of the most beautiful pictures of the day were taken inside the Central Park. We were thinking of riding on a cart but its $35 per person!!! nah.....Walking was much more fun and I could see images of movie appeared before me in this very park!

The Walk from Madison Ave back to 5th Ave was exhausting. Those shops were too high end for our eyes to see. The Pedestrians were all dressed up in fur coats and leather boots with big shopping bags from the famous brands of the world. We felt like we were at the wrong place! The only shop I dared go in is Jimmy Choo and that is because he is Malaysian. I wanna give him face. ahaha. Cheapest pair of shoes after 50 % off- $250.

Luckily we managed to escape. Shu Haur met me right after Jose left, and we went to discover that the Broadway show are all 50% off!! and we decided to watch the famous Phantom of the Opera, longest broadway show ever in history.

It is worth the money!!!Jamarla rushed in to the theatre the very last minute to join me for the Opera Ghost. The Chadeliar swung from the stage to the ceiling to open the play and the actors sang with their pure and flawless voice. It was such a splendid show! The costumes are so beautiful and the Phantom is such a tragic character. He is just another man who loves a beautiful woman.

All and all... a fun day!!

New York City!(click)

2008-12-13T02:06:00.003-05:00

Clear weather today compared to yesterday! Lawton , my host for New York City managed to bring me around the uptown 5th Avenue of New York City and got a glimpse of the famous Christmas Tree in front of Rockefella Centre , Trump Tower, Empire Tower, Times Square etc.

All and all, the city is vibrant, exciting and lots of lights!
Not to mentioned my favorite part of the day's trip. MoMA ( Museum of Modern Arts ) where I see Picasso, Cezanne and Matisse' s famous paintings!!!

High Achievers

2008-12-06T23:56:00.002-05:00

Obviously I am not talking about myself.

In the Midst of Finals, everyone on campus revealed their 'nerdiness' to everybody else. All the cafes are overcrowded with people buying coffees and energy drink to boost up their brain function. "All nighter" is the common answer for " How are you doing?", meaning staying up all night for studying.

Many of my peers came to me about not having enough confidence seeing that everybody else are excelling too. Mind you, this is Dartmouth, most of the people who got in are all high achievers, or so everybody else thinks. What happen to the other qualities that admission see in us? Aren't we somehow strive in our other areas such as leadership and artistic talents?

I wonder why people feel inferior around talented people. We are always competing with ourselves,not the others. Each of us has something to give, and if it is not academic, it would be something else. I tend to admire some of my talented peers but never make it an excuse to look down on myself. Why is there a need to condemn ourselves in this high institution that stress intellectual and humanitarian goals? Even thought we are people of color or non-American, that should not be a factor to be despair.

Instead to think of keeping everything to ourselves to avoid embarrassment (if there is), I find it better to put our ideas out there and welcome criticism. Most of the people here do not judge but provide different perspective to problems. The best thing of being students is that we are not compete with each other for survival, there are no cheating, power struggle or conspiracy involved in our learning process. Therefore why fear?

At the very same time as I was facing all this inferiority thoughts from my friends, I found the perfect article from a Dartmouth magazine. A black student from Pennsylvania got in to Dartmouth without receiving his friends' blessing. They thought that he never deserve Dartmouth's offer and thought he was only a factor of bringing diversity to the college. They overlook the fact that he is archieving too in high school and advised him not to be the "lowest of the cream". (Rather he should be the top student of an 'okay' college?!)His friends thought that he is going to Dartmouth to embarass himself by competiting with the best of the best. He was haunted by his best friends' "worry", he didn't do well in his first semester at Dartmouth. But as his grade slowly improved, he realized his own ability and become more apprieciative of the high education environment he is in.

"We are all here to learn, why does result matter as long we are learning?" True, if we learn with our whole heart, I do not think that the result will go any far away then our efforts put in. The learning process should be placed before the anticipation of the grade. Continue from the article, this black student graduated from Dartmouth and got admited to Havard as a graduate student. His friends must be embarrassed of even thinking that he is worthless of an Ivy League education.

Dear friends, if you are reading this, hope you are not pissing me off by saying you are not good enough for Dartmouth or anywhere else. You are selected or a reason, and don't even second guess the purpose of learning. It's never about competiting.

Turkey Meal

2008-11-28T06:46:00.002-05:00

I was wrong when I said there would be no turkey meal for me.

Just to make a point, I did took mom's advice to add a clock of my local time on the blog.

The turkey meal made me through the day without a second meal!

So, my friend Motema from Lesotho met a nurse practitioner, Betsy when she was in her PE class. They got along pretty well and Betsy invited her over for a Thanksgiving meal. Of course, being her buddy, I tagged along. It was the best decision ever despite I have never met Betsy before.

Predictably, I woke up late at noon and started to walk over to Betsy's house, which is a 20 minutes walk off the campus, up the hills. Those houses were so pretty, almost like Norwegian wooden houses. It was the furthest distance I have ever walk in Hanover, yeah, everywhere is nearer than this! :P

The exercise was worth it, If not I will not be able to move for the rest of the day! We were greeted warmly by Betsy and her whole family- daughters, parents and siblings! Most of them are graduated from Dartmouth!

Grandpa Harry was a 44 ( it means he graduated at 1944) before he joint the navy and met his wife, Mary , who's a physical theraphist and become a MD, he is 86 years old now and still remember clearly about his life back then. Both Betsy and her husband Richard are 77s and they met with each other on a study abroad program of Dartmouth in Russia! Betsy is the second batch of Dartmouth girls in college. Dartmouth only started to recruit women in 1973. Both of them, like Harry also ended up in the medical field where Betsy's a nurse and Richard a 'mcdreamy'- pediatric neurologist( brain doctor specialized in children). Lastly, their oldest son too went to Dartmouth. The rest of the family didn't want to go to Dartmouth, basically they lived too near . haha.

It was altogether Grandma Mary, Grandpa Harry, Betsy's family with Rachel and Alex, and Richard's brother, Rob's family with his wife and children, Elisa, Evan and Ashley, two guests, Hue Min and Andy where Hue min is a Dartmouth graduate from Korea and now studies PHD in Space Science and was their host son, with me and motema on the long dining table. Champagne, white wine, red wine were served along with the Big turkey and other dressing- cranberry , gravy, sweet potatos, etc ( they are sophisticaly made and dilicious!!!)

In the midst of the meal, we took turn around the table and said things that we are thankful for in Thanksgiving. Most of them said the most wonderful things I have heard: Some thankful for the recovery from sicknest, Hue Min is thankful for being lucky and alive after hearing his classmate genocide story from Rwanda, Andy is finally going home to South Korea after 4 years, Grandma is thankful for peace and me thankful for my incredible journey of self discovery and change with acceptance and understanding from my family!

The meal ended with Grandma Mary reading poems of " Keep it goin" , " If", and " the Highway Man" , all meaningful fit to our day's context.

When Betsy, Rachel and Elisa were walking us back to the campus for our next Thanksgiving meal ( no, we didn't continue eating then) , we realized how relevant their Dartmouth experience is to our video project of Dartmouth History that we decided to hold an interview with them the very next morning. Last but not least, Betsy warmly welcome us to be their host daughters.

Though strong and independant that I like to think of myself, sometimes it is good to 'melt' and admit once in a while the need to be in the family atmosphere. Glad that the opportunity came by and I took it!

So my first Thanksgiving in USA, I got my first turkey and a host family!

Thanksgiving break

2008-11-24T15:11:00.002-05:00

Dartmouth is very busy these few days. Students are busy packing and moving between bus stations to get to airport. Most of them are flying home for thanksgiving.

I was planning to go to New York but realized I need some air to just do my homework in a less time restricted atmosphere. My political anthropology paper and spanish exam will be due after this week, not to mentioned my 5 minutes movie is gonna be due next Monday. Yeah, Me and my groupmates are filming and editing a movie about history of Dartmouth and we chose the "Native American mascot"as our topic. Spent 4 hours just to edit the first 30 seconds, imagine the time need to be spent for the rest of the film.

Tonight will be another big night of performance. I , as usually will be drumming, but this time we have a more dramatic plot for the lion dance. ( it's gonna be drunk!!) ahaha. MTV dancers are coming in to lead audience to climax, not to mentioned there are other dance troups in dartmouth that will be performing.

Meanwhile, enjoyed winter shopping online and in second hand store. abit guilty of the money spent but it is necessary!! No turkey eating, but there are plenty of dinners for international student in thanksgiving, so no, I won't be lonely!!!

Tears and Excitement

2008-11-06T18:24:00.002-05:00

That is how I would describe yesterday.

I watched the speech at midnight given by Obama, and saw how my friends in Dartmouth reacted to his speech.

Obama really does move people. All of my friends kept nodding and Oprah is crying amongst the crowd while he spoke about change and . It was really phenomenal.

Later the next day, my writing professor cancel our class about the 'Gospels' and just solely talk about the elections that made history. It brings the people together again, but this time is not through tragedy but National Joy. People are ready to work with their leader instead of cynical towards the powerful authorities . Race is still an issue, but now at least there's no longer segregation and that Race is part of the judgment of choosing a leader. But Obama is only half black, technically he is half white and raised in south east asia. well.

Then in the evening, I had the most interesting conversation with my floormate, who is born in California , raised in a typical Taiwanese family. I confessed to her that I was more nervous talking to her than to other international students because even though we are both chinese, we are born in completely different environment. That really determines whether we clique or not as "chinese" or whether we should find another things to connect both of us.

I guess I have to be openminded not only to people from other culture, but also with people from the same culture. though we hold expectations to one another because we assumed we are taught the same value systems and family values, there are always surprises how things turn out influenced by other factor than our race.

That just means that we are required to talk evenmore to work things out!! yeaah....i love to talk ( sacarsm)

To check out reactions of Dartmouth student of the victory of Obama , please go to the link here:

Dartmouth students on election night

Tears and Excitement (click)

2008-11-06T18:09:00.005-05:00

That is how I would describe yesterday.
I watched the speech at midnight given by Obama, and saw how my friends in Dartmouth reacted to his speech.

Obama really does move people. All of my friends kept nodding and Oprah is crying amongst the crowd while he spoke about change and . It was really phenomenal.

Later the next day, my writing professor cancel our class about the 'Gospels' and just solely talk about the elections that made history. It brings the people together again, but this time is not through tragedy but National Joy. People are ready to work with their leader instead of cynical towards the powerful authorities . Race is still an issue, but now at least there's no longer segregation and that Race is part of the judgment of choosing a leader.

Then in the evening, I had the most interesting conversation with my floormate, who is born in California , raised in a typical Taiwanese family. I confessed to her that I was more nervous talking to her than to other international students because even though we are both chinese, we are born in completely different environment. That really determines whether we clique or not as "chinese" or whether we should find another things to connect both of us.

I guess I have to be openminded not only to people from other culture, but also with people from the same culture. though we hold expectations to one another because we assumed we are taught the same value systems and family values, there are always surprises how things turn out influenced by other factor than our race.

That just means that we are required to talk evenmore to work things out!! yeaah....i love to talk ( sacarsm)